Children jokes

+1 like = 1 kid in my basement.

+1 comment = 1 kid in my microwave.

+1 share = 1 kid in my blender.

I went over to a crying child and said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at an orphanage!

Guys, we need to stop making jokes about orphans. Their parents might get upset. Oh, wait... never mind.

I was sitting at a bench at the park and saw a lady. She asked which kid was mine, and I responded, "I haven't decided yet."

what does an orphanage and a hospital have in common?

people go there to fix their mistakes.

Little Johnny saw his dad getting head from his mom. Johnny asked what they were doing, and mom stopped and said she was fixing his dad's pants. Little Johnny says, "That explains what the lady next door was doing."

Why are orphans not boomerangs? Because they never come back.

Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who are they gonna cry to? Their parents?

Why do orphans hate school?

No field trips. Parent signature_____________.

Lil Jimmy: Hey doc.

Doctor: Hi, sorry but I can’t see you anymore.

Lil Jimmy: Why?

Doctor: Because, Lil Jimmy, I’m a family doctor, you're an orphan.

Lil Jimmy: 👁👄👁🖕

What is an orphan's favorite movie?

Home Alone.

What do you call a kid in a wheelchair that you push in a fire? Hot Wheels.

Orphans maybe got phones, but they don't have a home button.

I asked, "Where are your parents?" and oh god, I love working at an orphanage.

Why does an orphanage stay overnight at a school? Cause their parents won't pick them up.

Just hire some people to be fake parents and print off an adoption paper. On April Fools', just leave them there at the orphanage! APRIL FOOLS!

What do you call an orphan family tree?

A tree stump.

What's yellow and can't swim?

A bus full of kids.

I told my friend that we should dress up as P. Diddy and Drake for Halloween and ask parents if their kid wants to come over for a sleepover.

Are you a gun, because I would be your bullets because I love going in children.