Children jokes
Are you a gun, because I would be your bullets because I love going in children.
What do you get when you have 10 chicken nuggets and little Jimmy tries to take one?
10 chicken nuggets and a dead little Jimmy.
How do you keep your friends from boring you with pictures of their children?
Every time they show you a new one, you say, "Oh FUCK yeah!"
What do parents tell little boys to make them behave?
"Be good, or when you're asleep, Michael Jackson will get you!"
New Teacher: I was an orphan as a kid.
Students: Damn.
Teacher: Is anyone missing?
Students: Your parents!
Memes
What do I call a white person with 15 black kids?
Coach.
Nutted in my shoes, now my kids are taking a walk.
How many dead children does it take to change the light in a basement?
More than ten, apparently.
Orphans always dip their Oreos in water, hoping their dad comes back with the milk.
Why are orphans good at dodgeball?
They can dodge adoptions.
How do you get a black kid to stop jumping on your bed? Put velcro on the ceiling.
Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
A. Ask your mother.
What's an orphan's favorite Roblox game? Adopt Me.
What do pedophiles call children in wheelchairs?
"Meals on Wheels."
Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone?
He got hit by a train.
What do an orphan's parents have in common with Nemo? They all can't be found.
How many children does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Not 27, because my basement is still dark.
Chuck Norris used to be an orphan.
Because some families were too scared of his bravery to adopt him.
What is the difference between Michael Jackson and my uncle? Nothing, they both steal children.
What does Michael Jackson and Jeffery Dahmer have in common?
They both enjoy kids' company.