Childhood jokes
What do you call an orphan running home?
He couldn't find home.
What's the difference between a Christian and a child who believes Santa exists?
Nothing. They both believe in fairytales!
What's meaner than taking candy from a baby?
Throwing the baby off a cliff.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be Wanted.
Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.
I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.
What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time.
Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.
What is an orphan’s least favorite song? "We are Family."
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? "Family Guy."
What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? "Meet the Parents."
What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House.
Next: Inappropriate Jokes
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.
What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get.
Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?
Why did my dad leave me and my mum?
I told him it wasn't big enough and then ran off saying, "Daddy, yeeeees!"
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home.
What is an orphan's least favorite game?
44 Homes.
Orphans play baseball because I don’t know where home is.
What is an orphan's least favorite holiday?
Christmas, they wish they'd get parents.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they can’t find their way home.
What's the difference between cotton and an orphan?
One gets picked.
Why do orphans suck at baseball? Because they never could play catch.
An orphan thinks he finally sees his mom, but then he realizes it's air.
What is an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang because it actually comes back.
When I was 11, my mom came home from the bar super drunk that night, and I just wanted to know if they knew where the cat was because I heard a noise. We had a loooooooong talk the next morning.
The first orphan joke be like: What does the orphan not have?
A family.
My mum said not to walk the streets because I won't find home the next day. I was an orphan.
Why don't orphans go to the park?
Because their parents can't push them on the swing!
Addison Banks Age (8)
"I'm a little brat who won't shut the hell up! And stop talking!"
Do you know why orphans can't play baseball?
Because they can't find home.