Child jokes
Q: What's yellow and floats?
A: A bus full of children.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They can’t find home.
What do boobs and toys have in common?
They were both originally made for kids, but daddies end up playing with them.
What kind of club is every parent afraid of their kid joining?
The Mikey Jackson club.
How do you spell the name of the most dangerous pedophile?
M-I-C-H-A-E-L J-O-S-E-P-H J-A-C-K-S-O-N
How do terrorists feed their children?
"Here comes the aeroplane!"
"And here comes the second one!"
Memes
What does an orphan and a military man not have in common? Neither gets to go back home.
What’s the difference between air and a six year old?
Air has resistance.
What’s green and orange and sits at the bottom of the swimming pool?
A baby with burst armbands.
Why was the boy crying?
He had a frog stapled to his face.
How many dead children does it take to change the light in a basement?
More than ten, apparently.
Is it bad to hit an orphan?
It's not like they'll tell their parents.
Why can’t you kidnap an orphan?
Because you can’t steal what was never wanted in the first place.
One day Timmy walks in on his mum in the bath. Then he asks, “What’s that dark fuzzy thing, mummy?” and mum said, “It’s a bush, every girl has one!” Then the next day he walks in on his dad in the shower. So he asks, “Daddy, what’s that long thing?” The dad then says, “It’s a sexy boy” accidentally. Timmy asks his dad, “What does sexy mean?” And the dad says, “Your mother, of course,” making it seem like a child-friendly compliment. Then the next day at school Timmy wanted to compliment his teacher. He walks up to her and says, “You’re so so sexy!”
My ex was an orphan as a child.
I should have taken that as the first sign.
If her parents didn't want her, why would I?
Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
A. Ask your mother.
What's worse than placing 10 babies in a trash can?
Placing 1 baby in 10 trash cans...
If her age is on the clock, she gets the cock.
What do pedophiles call children in wheelchairs?
"Meals on Wheels."
How many orphans does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they don't even got a home.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't make a home run.