Child jokes
I got fired from my paramedic job on the first day. I told an eight-year-old who lost his leg in a car accident to "walk it off."
A cop pulls two Arabian men over, walks up to their window, and says, "We are looking for two child molesters!"
Now after a short pause, the two men look at each other, then back at the officer and say, "We'll do it!"
Why do orphans not play sport?
Because they need parents' permission.
Person 1: "I love KFC."
Person 2: "Yeah, me too!"
Person 1: "How many have you gotten?"
Person 2: "How am I supposed to remember how many buckets of chicken I have ordered!?"
Person 1: "Chicken? What chicken? What do you think KFC stands for?"
Person 2: "Kentucky Fried Chicken?"
Person 1: "What? I thought it meant kidnapping foster children."
Person 2: "BLOODY WHATT??"
How are you and an orphan similar?
Both of your fathers are invisible.
When you see a girl
I told an orphan to never stop talking until their parents come home.
Now I can’t get it to shut up.
What is more time-consuming than children?
Waiting for your wife to go into labor!
How do you tell a child they have cancer?
With a smile on your face.
Poop poop poop poop poop poop pp ppppppppppppoppppppppppooooooooooooooooooooppppppppppoooooopppp children pooooooooooooooooop in diapers.
A person had a child named Bl, another named Es, and one named S. The next was named You. They were a very unholy family.
Their children were shamed upon because their names spell out "Bless you."
If you hit a child, that's child abuse.
If you hit a family member, that's abuse.
If you kill either, it's murder for some reason.
If it's a whole family, it's genocide for another reason.
What is the one word orphans don’t know? Homework.
You are the reason why child abortion still exists in the world.
What’s the difference between a parentless child and someone who is fond of unprocessed metals?
One is an orphan, and the other is an ore fan.
Why do orphans love violent video games like GTA?
They never had parents to protect them from it.
What's an orphan's favorite sport?
Baseball, because that's the only time they can run home.
Can an orphan child be arrested for vandalism, or will the officers ask for their parents to talk to?
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find their home base.
Every depressed person just has to say, "I WANT TO JUMP OFF THAT TALL BUILDING RIGHT THERE!" and then points to the building and runs up to it like an immature child, and then they get disappointed when they aren't allowed into the building.
Follow for candy, kids.
Like for pizza, kids.
Comment for kids.