Child jokes

I would tell you an orphan joke, ehh I’ll just tell your parents instead.

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple's actually get picked.

After 12, it's lunch. 😂

My mum once told me, "How do you spell Mississippi?" and I said, "Misisipi." But she said, "No, it goes mi-ss-i-ss-pp-i," and I laughed when she said "pp." Then she said, "Why are you laughing?" I tried saying, "You said pp," but I was laughing too hard.

I asked a kid at my work where his parents were. He started crying. Man, I don't know what I did. I'll ask another kid at the orphanage.

I was walking down the street and saw a kid and I said, "Are you an orphan?"

He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"

I said, "Your parents at first."

Why did orphans want to commit a crime?

Because they wanted to see what it feels like to be wanted.

No one cares if you bully an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

A few kids were talking about how big their houses were. Kids were pointing to huge houses and huge apartments. One little boy said, "Bet I have the biggest home." To everyone's surprise, he pointed right towards the massive orphanage.

A police officer pulls over two Catholic priests. He says he's looking for two child molesters.

The Catholic priests look at each other: "We'll do it!"

I made a website to adopt orphans. But there is no home page.

My dad’s nickname for me is ‘Tiger’.

Now, my wrists look like a tiger.

I was laughing my ass off when the 12-year-old child realized the door to my basement was unlocked, and he didn't need to cannibalize his two friends in a desperate attempt for survival. 🤣🤣🤣

A Sunday school teacher asked her children on the way to service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" One little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."

How to get quick cash:

Step 1: Kill a child's parents.

Step 2: Do foster care for them.

Step 3: Get paid for doing foster care.

Dark humor is like cancer, it's even funnier when children get it.

What type of work can orphans do? Homework.

So, I was in the woods the other day raping this woman when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!'

I thought, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'

What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple gets picked.

An orphan is like marriage. The kid is always the reason for divorce. The kid is always the reason for his parents leaving him.