How many children can you fit in a box?
Maybe five if you have a trash compactor.
How are apples and orphans different?
Apples get picked.
Muslim child to his mother: "Mom, why is my backpack so heavy?"
Mom: "Allahu Akbar, my son, Allahu Akbar!"
Why do the orphans love going to the bakery down the street so much? Because their cookies are homemade.
Officer, I drop-kicked that child in self-defense!
You gotta believe me!
🎆 New Year's Eve
Lil Johnny👦: "Every year the same, people always have to start banging before midnight!"
Mom👱🏻♀️: "Johnny, would you please leave the bedroom now?"
Dad👨🏻🦰: "Son, if you don't leave, it'll bang on your head!"
Why do priests perform baptisms? So they can see children wet.
Why are most dark jokes about orphans?
They can't complain to their parents.
If an orphan takes a photo... Well done! It's a family photo!
What Spider-Man movie does an orphan like? Homecoming.
What's the difference between a trampoline and a dead baby?
I take my boots off before jumping on a trampoline.
A child is determined to burn his home down. His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm across the mother and stated, “That’s arson.”
Why does Michael Jackson do positions with kids in photos? Because they won’t do the same for him.
What type of cookie has an orphan never had? Home made cookies ;)
What's an orphan's least favorite film? Family Guy.
Dad: Ok son, if you fail this test, you're no longer my child, ok?
Son: Ok dad.
AFTER TEST
Dad: Hey son, how'd the test go?
Son: Son?
Why do we never make adult jokes in front of orphans?
Because the joke needs parental guidance.
I saw this kid who looked depressed, so I threw a torch at him. I thought I would brighten up his day.
I bought an orphan kid an iPhone.
Guess what? It had no home button.
What were Michael Jackson's last words? "Take me to the children's hospital."
