Why don’t orphans play poker?
'Cause they don’t know what a full house is.
Why did the Dinosaur cross the road?
'Cause the Chicken wasn't born yet.
I have been charged, because I roasted a kid at a barbeque.
If you're ever bored, just punch an orphan, because what are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Why don't we have female magicians?
'Cause the last ones got hanged.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? "Why?" 'Cause she had no arms.
Why did Sally drop a broom? "Why?" 'Cause she had no arms.
Why did Sally go swimming? She didn't like not having arms.
Knock knock. "Who's there?" Not Sally, she hasn't come back yet.
Me: Y’all should start calling me 1943.
Friend: Why?
Me: 'Cause I’m going through my own Great Depression.
Why is England bad at chess?
'Cause they lost their queen.
Are you acid, cause I want to throw [you] at my face?
Say this to your significant other (or your weird friends!)
Are you an unsafe staircase? 'Cause you look like you could use a railing.