Guy: Hi, how was your day today. Woman: Good! Guy: *Well I can’t ask her out cause she’s pregnant* Guy: How many months pregnant are you? Woman: What to you mean?!?! Also I’m not pregnant.
(only Ninjago fans understand XD) if you look outside, and its really windy, its really cloudy, and the sky looks greenish... you better run, cause it has to be Morro! XD
Why did the orphan get an iphonX cause theirs no home button
Its really great that you can make fun of orphans, 'cause what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
three guys walk into a room where a man is sitting with an assortment of foods on his plate cause it's lunch time the guys ask the man to do a favor and he says sorry guys I have a lot on my plate!
A man shot into a crowd at the train station and didn't hit one person, when the police asked why he missed, someone said cause he gay.
He couldn't shoot straight
Women be like men cause wars forgets men fight those wars while they fake cry
me : hey! do you know how to tie a knot? person : yea, why? me : cause I need help tying this noose :)
Me and my brother talking about relationships Me: We live kind of differently Brother: We're sort of alike Me: We're not alike Brother because he's taken: cause you don't have boyfriend! My thoughts: You're right. Cause I have a girlfriend!
A kid is arrested for a school shooting threat he is then apprehended and asked why he wanted to do this. He responds with "what do you mean I already did it" then the police ran back to the school to aprehend the other people he was planing it with the cops busted in through the doors which caused a smoke trap to go off which then the cops saw three people walk in and the police begin to fire. But as the smoke began to clear the cops saw that the three people were 16 kids duck taped to rolling poles 4 per pole. Back to the station holding the kid being apprehended. the kid puts his feet up on a chair and said "Aww it pays to be lazy!"
Why is a nun called a nun? Cause they aint supposed to get nun ;)
So I added Paul walker on Xbox the other day, and it’s annoying cause all he does isn’t sit on the dashboard
I'm hard right now
Cause your a DICKstraction
;) - SEO-YUN
Why are Chinese so good at jay-walking? Cause they can't tell the difference between green and red light with their tiny eyes.
why shouldn't you let a Chinese person play baseball?
cause they'll eat the bat
So i was laying in bed and jt winter do my room is aleays cold cause the heater doesnt work. And i was thinking.... It would be warmer if someone else was laying here with me.... Then i layghed cause who would wanna be with me. Hahaha
I wish I was a police man cause then I would actually have a gun to shoot myself with
bully : oh look at your shoes, look at your pants, look at your shirt ay ay ay
Me : ding, ding, sing oh did you hear that its the elevator cause your not on my level .......
bully : u_u .......
crwd : Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh
why did the sun go to college cause it already have a million degrees!
Why can't dinosaurs clap? Cause they're dead
