What's the difference between a cop car and a hedgehog?
With a cop car, all the pricks are on the inside.
Why did the people think Stephen Hawking was disrespectful?
'Cause he didn't stand up for the national anthem.
Are you the Twin Towers? 'Cause you sure upgraded.
Mom, where are we going?
To your grandma's funeral.
Yeah, 'cause I 360 no-scoped that b*tch in the face.
Yo hairline caused corruption.
A little girl said to her mom, "Mom, my butt's cracked, kiss it, kiss it!" Her mom said, "Sweetie, shut up, it's always been there!" Then her daughter died 'cause of her melodramaticness.
The West is dying...just like the romance of an empire, especially the western part of the empire. Funny that, 'cause the East was going strong.
Why can't the orphan run past third base?
'Cause the orphan doesn't have a home to run to.
I don't need a girlfriend, 'cause I got my cousin, bro.
Why don't pirates take a bath before walking the plank?
'Cause they just wash up onshore.
How come orphans know how to do laundry?
Cause that's usually the mom's job.
I don't like calculator jokes because they are too overused.
What did the orphan do when he got punched?
Nothing, because his parents weren't there! :)
Man: Why can't an orphan use Verizon?
Kid: I don't know why.
Man: Because they have a family plan.
Kid: Well, I need to get another phone service now.
Why do orphans only have 354 days?
'Cause they are missing Mothers and Fathers day!
When I aim this trigger, it all goes red.
Do you have a bounty 'cause you got a "M" on your head?
There are only women's rights causes because they leave you.
Why don’t orphans play poker?
'Cause they don’t know what a full house is.
Have you ever wondered why orphans hate milk?
'Cause their dad never came back with it.
Why are orphans bad at Yahtzee?
Because they don't know what a full house is :(
