Catholic jokes
So, I was in the church the other day, raping this woman, when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!' I said, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'
What does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common? They both ask people, "Where's the meat?"
What do Catholic priests and school shooters have in common?
They both like to dump their loads into little kids.
I was raised a Catholic, and my priest told me when I was 12, "God is watching you when you masturbate."
I said, "Is God a pedophile too, Father?"
Why do Roman Catholics have so many kids?
So there’s more for the priest.
Why am I banned from my Catholic orphanage?
Because the children kept calling me "daddy."
What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit?
A zit will wait until you’re twelve before it comes on your face.
What do McDonalds and priests both do?
They both put their meat between 10-year-old buns.
Why can't orphans convert to Catholicism?
Because Catholics believe in no sex before marriage.
What do Catholic priests and JCPenny's have in common?
Little boys' pants half off.
I'm treated like God when I'm home, I'm usually ignored until someone wants something.
What do fat demons hate? Exorcise.
What's the difference between a Catholic Priest and a pedophile?
One is Catholic.
I always hated being born a Catholic as a kid. The way you have to keep kneeling down, bending over, and standing up all within a few minutes of each other while at church. I was always thinking, “For God’s sake, just pick a position and fuck me!”
What do altar boys and strippers have in common? Father issues.
What is the difference between a Catholic priest and acne? -- Acne comes on your face after you turn 13.
Guys, we gotta stop telling these jokes. They are getting out of h- oh wait no .... Continue.
Yo daddy so stupid, he threw a Father’s Day party at the orphanage.
What did the Catholic priest say to the other Catholic priest as they entered the orphanage? Let’s us prey.
Why did the Italian American Roman Catholic priest perform fellatio on gay men at the glory hole inside the adult bookstore?
Someone asked him what would he do for a Klondike Bar?
Why do Catholic Irishmen in Ireland have a glory hole in the men's restroom inside their restaurants so they can give Irish kisses on Saint Patrick's Day?
How do you know if a homophobic woman that is a Christian nationalist and Catholic is poor enough she would be desperate enough to do anything to pay her bills?
she would be willing to perform anilingus and cunnilingus on women regardless of their sexual orientation in the LGBT community.