Cant jokes
The doe comes out of the woods, shakes herself, and says,
"I can't believe I did that for 2 bucks!"
What’s yellow and can’t swim?
A bus full of children.
Boi, you can't be talking because if someone punched you in the face, you will be the one to apologize.
Why can't British people play chess?
Because they lost their queen.
What’s the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can’t hear an enzyme.
I can’t believe I’ve never seen this before
What do blind people and orphans have in common?
They both can't see their parents.
Why can't Paris play chess? Because they don't have their towers (also known as rooks).
How to get rid of your depression:
1. Stop self-pitying.
2. Realize you can't.
3. Fucking deal with it.
You're welcome.
Why can’t orphans play baseball? Because they can’t find the first base they came from.
There was an oil spill in the ocean. Now the ocean can't see!
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese. Okay, I can't do this anymore.
Why can't you make jokes about catholic priests?
Because they blow up in your face.
Why can't Asian people use a telephone?
Because they might wing the wrong number.
Why can't orphans be criminals?
Because they're not wanted.
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
A boy went to a doctor, and the doctor said, "I can't treat you." The boy asked why, and the doctor said, "Because I'm a family doctor."
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call "Daddy!"
Why can’t an orphan play baseball? Because it can’t find home.
Why can't the orphans play baseball?
They have no home to run to...
A kid told me to go get a dad, so I punched the kid. He went to tell his parents. Oh wait, he can't, 'cause he's an orphan, and orphans have no parents.