Canning Jokes

Who makes more money, a drug dealer or a prostitute?

A prostitute, because she can always wash her crack and sell it again.

What can a physically handicapped β™Ώ gay man πŸ‘¬ do on his own very well πŸ‘ without being taught how to do?

Perform fellatio on gay men.

Me: *opens a bag of hot Cheetos in class*

All my friends: Hey bro, can I have some?

People I don't know: Please lemme have some. PLEASE, I'll be your best friend!

People I say no to: (βŠ™-βŠ™)(βŠ™-βŠ™)(βŠ™-βŠ™)(βŠ™-βŠ™)(βŠ™-βŠ™)(βŠ™-βŠ™)

What’s the bravest thing a man can do?

Say, β€œI’m going to get milk!” to his wife and kids.

Alright, I'm gonna drink the lo-carb one to see how it compares to the normal Monster.

Holy shit, it tastes just like the original one.

There's like a weird after taste though.

Kinda like a sparkling water one.

I love Monster. I've drank about 5 cans already.