I am in trouble my mum ask me to get six cans of sprit
But I got seven ups
:Charger: yo Phone :Phone: yeah Charger can I plug all in u :Phone: ayooo
Period: Guess who’s back... back again... Me: Ugh, can we not do this today? Period: I can come back in 9 months? Me: Keep fucking singing.
If per capita is an issue, decapita can be arranged.
teacher said "you never do your homework" so I shot her 7 times with a m1BushDid911 and replied it's all in my backpack can you grade it please
boy: hello mom can I have have 50$.mom:does it look like I am made of money.boy: that's what M.O.M means right.
my worst fear is being trapped in a lift with a man who is confident he can fix it.
Dad: Ill pay you 10 bucks for every day you don't tell a lie Next day: Dad: son what's the ugliest thing you've ever seen? Son: That ugly face of yours, go get a life gosh dad your embarrassing. The dad sulked for 3 whole years Proof that words really can hurt
boy: "why cant you get a family" me: "why cant you get a rope" boy: "wdym" friend and me: "we can show you" me: "i will tie the rope" friend: "i will push the chair"
The best part about having autism is being able to make jokes about genociding autistic people and no one can say a damn thing
What do cannibals call an orphanage, all you can eat buffe.
why cant orphans sleep nobody can tuck them in
Can I get a Hoyah?
Can you dislike this!
A father of five puts on gas mask and a hazard suit, and walks outside, but before he could make it, his son came and asked "Dad, what are you wearing?". The father would answer with "A costume for Halloween.". the child asked "can i join?". He said no, for he said it's their last Halloween. *after that, I saw green smoke all over the same house they lived in.
Why can't I touch little old women but nursing home nurses can.....
rOpe: hEy buddY! wanT to hAng? me: mAYbe i cAn hAnG LaTer... cOCk: can i HaVe attenCioN froM youR dAd nOw?--
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they come back.
name one person who would take a orphan micheal jackson so they can play all night
Jesus was being hug up on the cross, and me and all the other people at the bottom of the hill were watching. Jesus cries out ''Peter, peter come to me!'' So I climb up the hill on my hands and knees, and when i reach the top the Romans cut of my arms and chuck me back down the hill. ''Peter, peter come to me!'' cries Jesus once more. I stumble up the hill then the Romans cut my legs of and threw me back down. For the third time Jesus cries ''Peter peter come to me!''. So i wriggle up the hill and I guess the romans pitied me and let me through. ''Look peter, I can see my house from here!''
