New Came Jokes - Page 9 - Worst Jokes Ever

There was once a young sister who never got anything good for her birthday, and she was sick of it. So one day the girl asked for a puppy, and the parents said yes.

When she got the puppy, he was nice, but the puppy needed food every two minutes. The parents eventually got sick of it and came up with a plan. Two weeks passed and the younger and less fat sister asked where her other sister was as she wanted to play Barbies. “And also, why haven’t you been feeding the dog? He needs food, you know.” The parents only answered with “Oh! Yes, you can have a room all to yourself now. And about the puppy...he won’t need feeding for years.”

Last Christmas was awesome, the whole family came.

My girlfriend broke up with me, so I decided to take her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?

How many emos does it take to fix a light?

I don't know because they never came down.

Your hairline and my car go Lighting McQueen speed because he never came back with the milk.

"This morning, I came out my front door to see my neighbor frantically trying to scrub off the word "PEDO" that had been spray-painted on his front window."

"What's been going on, John?" I asked.

"Fucking kids," came his mumbled reply.

The dirty bastard!

My dad went to go get milk. He came back 7 years later, and we had to send him back because he got the wrong milk.

I ordered my sandwich at a restaurant on 9/11 spicy, it came out plain.

When David lost his ID, I called him Dave. Where did Dave go during the bombing? Everywhere. Guess who came crawling back?

So I told an orphan to slap themselves until they are wanted. I came back the next day to see them slapping themselves. Then I stopped them and told them to punch themselves.

The next day I saw a dead orphan.

I didn't come into the prostitution business...

It came into me.

Yo dad's so stupid, he came back with the milk!

One day, the fat kid came up to me and asked me, "What's cracking?" The floorboards, you idiot. You're causing a 9.7 Richter scale earthquake and asking ME what's cracking. It would be best if you looked down for a second.

Have you ever wondered why orphans hate milk?

'Cause their dad never came back with it.

Why do you not have milk with your Oreos?

Daddy never came back with the milk.

Why do orphans have water with their cereal?

Because the dad never came back with the milk.

When I was 11, my mom came home from the bar super drunk that night, and I just wanted to know if they knew where the cat was because I heard a noise. We had a loooooooong talk the next morning.