Call jokes

Jeff asks, "Did you hear about the guy they call the flash?"

Bob responds, "No, I haven't. Do they call him that because he runs fast?"

Jeff replies, "Nah, they call him that because he doesn't wear pants."

What's the best comeback for a person calling you an orphan?

Kill their parents.

What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire? "HOT WHEELS"

What do you call a transgender person? Nintendo Switch.

What do you call a murderer with two butts? An assassin.

What do you call a blind German? Someone who can't Nazi!

What do you call a virgin lying on a waterbed?

A cherry float.

What do you call it when everyone of your friends makes too many dumb Covid jokes? A pundemic.

I called the suicide hotline, and he suggested I draw on myself to distract myself.

I replied I'd get ink poisoning.

Wouldn't recommend, the police came.

What do you call a woodpecker without a beak?

A headbanger.

Call me an elevator, because I let people down.

What do you call depressed coffee?

Despresso ;)

What do you call an orphan family photo?

A selfie.

Why aren't apple chargers called apple juice? Also, how do you throw away trash cans?

I work as an IT technician. The other day, I had to fix Cristiano Ronaldo’s laptop. He pointed to a message on the screen saying, “Do you consent to cookies?” He said that he doesn’t eat cookies and doesn’t know what consent means, so that’s why he called me.

I have an exam next week, so I called my ex and asked if she had any cheating tips.

So yesterday, I was at an orphanage, harassing children by twerking at them.

They burst into tears.

I was worried that they would call their mom, well... um... I got away.

What do you call an 18 year old orphan?

Homeless.

What do you call an orphan? No home-o.

I once called a depressed guy [to ask] why he loves ropes so much, and he left HUNGing on the phone. (I'm not English, so I could've talked bad.)