Call jokes
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe?
Fur Traders.
What do you call depressed coffee?
Despresso ;)
I work as an IT technician. The other day, I had to fix Cristiano Ronaldo’s laptop. He pointed to a message on the screen saying, “Do you consent to cookies?” He said that he doesn’t eat cookies and doesn’t know what consent means, so that’s why he called me.
Suicide isn't a joke. It's called "parkour gone wrong."
Memes
What do you call a FAT Man under 5'9"?
A JUMBO shrimp.
What do you call a disabled person who gets high?
Baked potato.
I once called a depressed guy [to ask] why he loves ropes so much, and he left HUNGing on the phone. (I'm not English, so I could've talked bad.)
Apple made a new product for Chinese people called the iOpener.
What do you call a boy Panera Bread?
Panera Balls.
What do you call a warrior that's going to bed?
A knight knight.
Person A: What do you call the dangly bit of an octopus?
Person B: Tentacles?
Person A: Ok *tickles person B ten times*
What do you call an act of “funny” discipline? A PUN-ishment!
What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?
Philipe Philope.
What do you call a basement full of SJW's?
A whine cellar.
What do you call a pineapple in a pun?
A Puneapple.
If someone calls you dirty minded just say:
"You are dirty minded as well if you understand what I'm saying."
What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call him, he's not coming.
What do you call a digital hamburger? Processed meat.
What do you call a cow in the snow?
Chilli Beef.