Call jokes
What do you call Mexicans in a band trying to be a white band?
"Juan Direction."
Me: Calls 9-1-1.
Operator: 9/11, what’s your emergency?
Me: *hangs up*
What do you call it when Hitler puts retards in the oven? Baked potatoes.
What do you call the place where an octopus is sitting?
Octopied.
What do you call a man who plays Fortnite 24/7?
A: A virgin.
Memes
History meme for y’all
What do you call your brother in Alabama? Daddy.
I called the Chinese takeaway yesterday. A man picked up the phone and said: "Hello! I am Wan Kin, the chef." I said that I'll come back later.
God: Ok, so I created adults. And I created how they are supposed to look from being born to preteen.
Satan: (slides in) I’ll take over for you, pops.
God: I dunno... this is very delicate work. Just one wrong thing can ruin the system.
Satan: Don’t worry your beard off! (Pats his back) I’ll just do the ages from 12 to 18!
God: Hmm... I’m still not- (Gets a call on his phone) Shoot, I got to take this. (Answers call) Don’t touch anything, Lucifer! (Walks away)
Satan:.......(just touches lightly, and alarms start blaring. He squeaks and runs away)
God: (rushes in) WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!?!
God: (tries fixing problems. Only gets alarms off) Fuck me........
God:....(sighs) Fine, it’ll stay. We’ll just call it....puberty.
What do you call a vegan slut?
A garden ho!
I hit a ball with a bat, it was called animal abuse.
My sister asked me what is dark humor. I asked what does a cannibal call a pregnant woman? "Kinder Surprise!"
What do you call a cow that's beating his meat? Beef stroganoff!
What do you call a gay threesome?
A Sloppy Joe.
What do you call terrible milk?
Udder Bullshit.
What do you call an idiotic cow?
A mis-steak!
What do you call a Chinese man in the heat?
Boi Ling.
What do you call a sheep on steroids? A woolly mammoth.
Q: What do you call it when four Mexicans drown in quicksand?
A: Cuatro Cinco.
What do you call a fish with no eye?
Fsh.
Remember kids if ur ever mad beat up an orphan what are they gonna do call their mom??