Call jokes
What do you call a skeleton's omelet?
A bonelet.
What do you call a one-legged hippo?
A hoppo!
Have you heard of the show Naked and Afraid?
That's what I call hide and seek with my uncle.
In prison, they called me sweet cheeks.
What do you call it when a gay guy farts?
An abortion.
C A S T O R here is proof the names are marked out for privacy
Last week I felt so high and mighty I thought I could fly. I took one shot, puffed through my pipe, and jumped in the air on a trampoline. I woke up in heaven.
I asked an angel, "How did I die?"
"Well, little monkey, you thought your bed was a trampoline and you hit your head. Your mom called the doctor, and the doctor said you were dead."
What do you call a dick playing badminton?
A shuttlecock.
What do you call a rapper's favorite place to eat?
The MIC Donald's drive-thru.
My girlfriend called me a pedophile... That's a big word for a 1st grader.
Bro, yesterday this bird made the weirdest chirp. It sounded something like this:
"Error code 6, 4, 4, 2, sound: bird call, failed to play, government drone 0, 7, 7, 5 requires maintenance."
Anyone know what bird that is?
Why do kids like to pick on orphans?
Because they can't call their parents.
What do you call an ant with so much power?
A ter-mite.
What do you call a country with nukes?
Abomination.
What do you call a lesbian vampire?
Cunt Dracula.
Few jokes (sorry if they have already been used).
1 I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
2 Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he always has a great fall.
3 Have you heard the one about the skunk? Never mind, it really stinks.
4 It's always windy in a sports arena. All those fans.
5 What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!
6 Comic Sans walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your type here."
7 What's the easiest way to get straight As? Use a ruler.
8 Why were they called the Dark Ages? Because there were lots of knights.
Once Jimmy was minding his own business, then he hears his mom come home. He asked, "Where have you been?" She replied with, "I was at work," yet he knew his mom did not have work. So the next day, while heading to school, he gets a phone call saying his mom is pregnant, and they want to try their device, and they need the baby's dad to say if it's alright.
What do you call an autistic kid if he was short?
A short tistic.
My girlfriend called me a "bot" in Fortnite, so I called her "sandwich maker 3000."
When someone calls you gay, say:
"I'm straight, straighter than your hairline!"
*Ring Ring!*
Who’s there?
Soldier!
Soldier who?
You’ve soldier house! Congrats!
waHt