Calendar jokes
Which days are the strongest?
Saturday and Sunday. The rest are weekdays.
What comes after 69?
Period.
"It's Sunday evening!"
"No. It's Monday eve."
Why do orphans only have 360 days?
Because they don't have Mother's and Father's days.
I made an advent calendar for a Jehovah’s Witness.
Behind every door someone tells you to fuck off.
Memes
Orphans have 363 days on a calendar because they don't have Mothers' or Fathers' Day.
Why does an orphan's year only have 363 days? Because it's missing Mother's and Father's Day.
Why do orphans only have 363 days of the year?
Because they don't have a Mother's and Father's Day.
Why do orphans only have 354 days?
'Cause they are missing Mothers and Fathers day!
12/8?
What is the shortest month of the year?
May, it only has 3 letters!
What is a chicken's favorite day of the week? Fri-day.
"I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered!"
There are 365 days in a year. Orphans have 363 because they don’t have a Mother’s or Father’s Day.
What is shark's favorite day?
Chewsday.
Last time I got caught stealing a calendar, I got 12 months.
What month has 28 days?
All of them.
Why are there only 363 days for orphans?
Because they don't have Mothers' and Fathers' Day.
Why do orphans have 363 days in a year?
Because they don't have a mother's or father's day.
"What time is it?"
"Daytime."