Calendar jokes
Why do orphans only have 363 days of the year?
Because they don't have a Mother's and Father's Day.
Why do orphans only have 360 days?
Because they don't have Mother's and Father's days.
Why do orphans only have 354 days?
'Cause they are missing Mothers and Fathers day!
I made an advent calendar for a Jehovah’s Witness.
Behind every door someone tells you to fuck off.
12/8?
Five more days.
Which days are the strongest?
Saturday and Sunday. The rest are weekdays.
What comes after 69?
Period.
Why was 2019 afraid of 2020?
Because they had a fight, and 2021.
"It's Sunday evening!"
"No. It's Monday eve."
Hey Siri, skip to Friday!
What is the shortest month of the year?
May, it only has 3 letters!
What is a chicken's favorite day of the week? Fri-day.
"I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered!"
There are 365 days in a year. Orphans have 363 because they don’t have a Mother’s or Father’s Day.
Last time I got caught stealing a calendar, I got 12 months.
What is shark's favorite day?
Chewsday.
10/7 is probably a spinoff of 9/11.
You can't convince me otherwise.
What month has 28 days?
All of them.
Why are there only 363 days for orphans?
Because they don't have Mothers' and Fathers' Day.