Calendar

Calendar Jokes

Orphan

Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?

Because they miss Mother’s Day and Father’s Day.

Date

10/7 is probably a spinoff of 9/11.

You can't convince me otherwise.

Father's Day

Why do some kids only experience 364 days per year?

Because they don't have a Father's Day.

Man

Why did the man get fired from the calendar factory?

He only took a day off.

Orphan

Why do orphans only have 363 days in the year?

Because they don’t have a Mother's nor Father’s Day.

Birthday

A man dies of old age on his 25th birthday. How is this possible?

Answer: He was born on February 29.

Door

I made an advent calendar for a Jehovah’s Witness.

Behind every door someone tells you to fuck off.

Orphan

Why do orphans have 363 days in a year?

Because they have no Father's or Mother's days.

Name

Englishman: We named our son George since he was born on Saint George's Day.

Irishman: We called our daughter Valentine since she was born on Valentine's Day.

Scotsman: We named our son Pancake because he was born on Pancake Day!

Day

What day can you have sex on?

Answer: Wednesday. Why? Because it's hump day.