But jokes

The Twin Towers ordered pepperoni pizza, but got plane.

There’s no “I” in team, but there is a “U” in cunt.

I was gonna stop for the cops, but I ran because I was high (the song don't copyright me plz).

How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But you need 5000 Soviet troops in case he goes on strike!

I used to have a son, but he died the same way Eric Clapton's son died. For inspiration.

Can February march?

No, but April may.

Sorry man, but I got to say one thing. You know when a bully in a movie walks to you, then they walk up to you, and they smell you and say, "What are you doing?"

"Back To The Future"-Doc: You can time travel to anytime in HISTORY, Marty, but NEVER go to the year 2021.....

But (DYM 87).

Ok, everyone on this website... I HAVE NO BROTHERS OR SISTERS. The person who claims he's my "brother" is firesharky. He is trying to get fame. Never listen to him. He will lie and trick you to think I have a brother, but I don't.

I hope you see this plugin, but if you're listening to this, I really want to give you a little more...

In an alternate universe: I don't know how to solve the power of 10, but I do know how to pay taxes.

A tortoise was in a dry pool along with some geese. The tortoise said that they could carry him to a fresh pool. Then the geese flew through the air holding the tortoise. The tortoise was about to say something, but fell and died.

I played catch with my friends, but they keep going to sleep when I throw it.

Why did the orphan cross the road?

To try to find his parents, but it was FREAKING USELESS!

Sometimes I wish I could use my school scissors on my heart.

But apparently there is something in your heart, so I already have scissors in my heart.

What is always in front of you but can’t be seen?

Answer: The future.

Dad: Alive.

Brother: Orphan (fault=Mother).

Me: Dead on the inside but sadly alive.

Mother: Alive...

Wait a minute... I thought you were dead, Mom... Right, you're dead to me at least.

I've heard stories of my mother. She was a teenager and left me in the blender, but luckily the power cut out, like at the orphanage.

What has a tail, a head, but no body?

A coin.