But jokes

"Give it to me! Give it to me!" she yelled. "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, but I was keeping the umbrella.

A donut is not empty inside, that was a hole in the middle. If I'm a donut, the hole used to be where I put my feeling and happiness, but people snatch it away from me.

Anyway, can someone put a hole in my physical body too? I kinda wanted to see people cry for me just like how people cry for Ace from One Piece.

I wanted to tell a commie a joke about food, but he’d have to wait 10 years to get it.

What’s the best thing about Switzerland?

I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You slept with my cousin but I did too.

Why were the Twin Towers so mad?

They ordered pepperoni, but they got plain.

The daughter of an incestuous pedophile goes into the living room where he is watching TV and asks him if she can borrow the car that evening.

"Sure honey! If you suck my dick!"

So she gets down on him but something is wrong. She pops her head up and says: "Dad! This tastes like shit!"

"Oh yeah, I forgot," says the father. "I already gave your brother the car for tonight."

One time I was with my uncle. He said to me to pass him the marble on the floor. All I heard was my butt clapping with his sausage.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to celebrate their marriage.

Nine months later, they happily had some use for their baby carriage.

Two years later, they went up again, then their daughter had a brother.

But one little secret that no one knew was that Jack and Jill share a mother.

One time, little Johnny was watching TikTok, and he saw a toy that he wanted so badly, so he cleaned up the whole house and did his homework. When he was done, he saw a spill on the table. He went to the sink to grab a cloth, but when he came back, it was gone. He went to his mom's room and saw a drink with the label "daddy's drink," so he drunk it and said, "It's daddy's; he won't mind," and all day he was like the Flash. So he went back, turned the bottle around, and it said "Speedy," and then he said, "Oh, great heavens!"

I was going to tell a joke about a mirror, but it seems that I'm looking at one.

Yo momma is so fat, when she fell I was not laughing, but the sidewalk cracked up.

What is red, orange, and yellow but doesn’t feel anything when it falls? Autumn leaves. 🍁

I'm 14. I have had sex before. I have 206 bones in my body, but when I'm with my gf, I have 207.

Your mom is so fat when she skipped a meal, the whole stock market crashed.

Your mom is so fat she tripped, and I didn’t even laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.

Saw that shit on Roblox.

My parents were concerned when I said I like to bleed, but at least I cut my risk of cancer and stroke in half.

Why were the Twin Towers angry?

Because they ordered pepperoni, but they got plane.

The orphan tried to play baseball, but he couldn't get home because home doesn't exist for him.

I'm no astronomer, but I’m pretty sure the Earth revolves around the sun... not you.

Last post for today, but I had to say one more thing! Tomorrow I am going to Six Flags, and I am literally so excited! It is going to be so much fun. Hope you guys have a good MLK JR. day! Woohooo!