Yo mama so fat that State Farm tried to get on her side but couldn’t.
Business Jokes
A suicidal customer walks into a gun store.
Cashier: Is this your final purchase?
Customer: Actually, yes it is!
What do you call a factory that makes okay products?
"A satisfactory."
When you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.
I was walking by the gun shop earlier and saw everything was 40% off. I didn't know back to school sales were already starting.
Person 1: "I love KFC."
Person 2: "Yeah, me too!"
Person 1: "How many have you gotten?"
Person 2: "How am I supposed to remember how many buckets of chicken I have ordered!?"
Person 1: "Chicken? What chicken? What do you think KFC stands for?"
Person 2: "Kentucky Fried Chicken?"
Person 1: "What? I thought it meant kidnapping foster children."
Person 2: "BLOODY WHATT??"
A snake walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "How?"
What do alien moms like to drink? Starbucks.
New business idea: let's put a KFC in Africa and a watermelon shop.
Inflation is so bad, McDonald’s is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?"
Did you hear about the broken guitar for sale?
It comes with no strings attached.
What is the easiest way to get into a busy hospital? Try to commit suicide.
(YES I KNOW I SPELLED SCUCIDE WRONG)
Did you hear about the fire at the shoe factory?
Unfortunately, many soles were lost.
What shoe shop would be a lesbian's best friend, decimen?
Why don't gays shop at sports authority?
They prefer Dick's.
Ever had that feeling that suicidal people are a big contributor to the razor blade industry?
Well, they aren't.
Why?
They aren't repeated customers.
What type of restaurant can an orphan not go to? A family diner.
A duck walks into a bar and buys everyone a round. He tells the bartender, “Put it on my bill.”
One time I was playing a bongo at a Chinese restaurant.
But they were competing against a Cuban restaurant and killed me.
