Bro jokes
Girls' dreams: OMG, my crush kissed me!
Boys' dreams: I just got a dub, bro!
Bro, my friend is always using zodiacs as an excuse.
The other day he said he couldn't hang out with me because of cancer. I told him to fuck off. Then I realized why he was mad after that...
Bro, living is so expensive, and I'm not even having fun doing it or getting my money's worth.
Bro, the US keeps bullying the UK because the queen died, and do you know the meme "No Bitches?" Yeah, they put "No Queen" instead. And guess what? The UK replied this time and said, "No Towers?" I was shocked. UK's most devious lick.
Bro, just imagine being named Brynley. Couldn't be me.
Two people stood in one room. The first guy stared at the second.
First guy: “Sorry I had to punch you. It was a game, bro.”
Second guy: “Between me and you talking, there’s almost no PUNCH line. Hah!”
I told someone some jokes, y'know? "Fruit Ninja," "barcode legs," "French puppet thigh wrings." And she was like saying that's not cool and stuff. So she reported me, and it was like:
The counselor: "So I've heard you've been making sh jokes?" Me: "You say it like it's a bad thing." Her: "It is." Me: "Chill bro, it ain't that deep. Don't worry I'll end it :)"
Bro, the airplanes that crashed, darn it, they got MVP!
The man says, "Can you hump me?" So the other boy says, "Bro bro bro bro bro."
Bro, the Twin Towers are like my grandpa and his friends. One survived—my grandpa. The others have fallen—his friends.
🗣: "Stop making suicide jokes!"
"Don't worry bro, I'll end it soon."
Bro, why does Ohio look like Fallout 4?
I was joking about self-harm to my friend, and she told me to "CUT it out!" I couldn't even laugh.
When we were at the self-checkout, she started scanning my arms. I asked her what she was doing. She said, "Trying to see if it beeps, ya think I'd get it to work if I scanned your thighs?"
I said, "Nah, bro, you'd overload the system if you put it there."
One man said, "The audacity on that deaf kid!"
The other man said, "Bro, does he even have audio?"
Bro, I thought your hairline was the Dorito logo.
Me: Bro, I don't think the Twin Towers will ever order pizza again.
Friend: Why?
Me: Because when they ordered pepperoni, all they got was plane.
Dude, people gotta stop letting 9/11 jokes fly around like bro, you're gonna make my brain explode!
"Bro is sooooo fine!"
Why was the number 10 scared? Because bro was stuck between 9/11.
Three guys are standing in an alley on an alien planet, and the psycho one says, "However many tits your girl has is how many balls you have!"
The first guy says, "Ha! My girlfriend has six! I'm racked up!" The second guy said, "Eh, I am happy with two balls." The third guy said, "Shit! My girlfriend is flat as fuck!"
A guy listening in enters and says, "Bro, you actually have girlfriends. I do not. Does that mean I have a pussy?"