Born jokes

Mary: If you born pikin (child) inside shop, wetin you go call that pikin (child)?

Mike: The pikin (child) go bear Bishop.

Englishman: We named our son George since he was born on Saint George's Day.

Irishman: We called our daughter Valentine since she was born on Valentine's Day.

Scotsman: We named our son Pancake because he was born on Pancake Day!

Bully: Agh, you're ugly!

Me: Said your mom when you were born.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She was born without arms.

I used to be a man in a woman’s body. And then I was born.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I was born pretty, what happened to you?

You were born on a road. That's where most accidents happen.

What was Jesus' reaction when the first black person was born?

"Holy shit, I burnt one."

A woman delivers a baby. The doctor takes the baby and throws it, smashing it around the hospital room, drop-kicking it, etc. The mother starts freaking out, being held back by nurses, begging, “WHYYYY!!??”. The doctor holds the baby upside down by the ankle and says, “I’m just fucking with you, it was born dead”.

So a kid asks his dad, "Why was I born?"

The dad replies, "I thought that girl was dead!"

You were supposed to be born in the tree.

The sticks were your siblings.

When your parents say, "We are sorry that you are here," what do you think of that?

I think that you're an accident!

My sister said that I need to stop with the audited butt:

I got it from her when I was born.

When a baby was born to a slave, did the slave owners hang a "Bred in Captivity" sign above the crib?

I feel bad for the people who were born on April 1.

Their life is a joke.

Why do feminists believe that they can act like a bitch towards men if they want to? Because they were born without a penis.

A momma cow and three baby calves are on a farm. The first baby calf asks the momma cow, "Mom, why is my name Rose?"

The mom responded, "Well, you see, when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head."

The second one asks her, "Then why is my name Daisy?"

The mom chuckled and simply replied with, "When you were born, Daisy petals fell on your head."

The last one said, "DUH DUR SURH!"

The mom said, "SHUT UP, CINDER BLOCK!"

You were born on the highway. That's where all the accidents happen!

What do you call a baby that came out of their mother's womb? A virgin.

What do you call children born from incest?

Gross Domestic Product.