What do you call a fish with no eye?
A one-eyed fish, you smart ass!
What do you get when you cross breed a woman and a horse? A neigh-ga.
You've got a body inside you--it's called your body bones.
You've got a body inside you. It's called your bones.
What did one cell say to his sister when she stepped on his toe? Mitosis!
What do you call an animal with 3 eyes, 2 mouths, 6 noses, and 4 ears?
How many times do you tickle an octopus to get it to laugh?
Ten-tickles!
Why do cows have hooves?
Because they lactose!
Why does the nucleus feel trapped?
Because it’s inside a cell!
Why can't dinosaurs clap?
'Cause they're dead.
Why couldn't the dinosaur clap? They're dead!
What do you call a person whose heart stopped?
Dead.
What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler!
Why don't skeletons fight each other?
They don't have the guts.
What's the difference between a bird and a fly?
A bird can fly, but a fly can't bird!
Yo mama so fat, her blood type is mayonnaise.
Why did the octopus blush?
He saw the bottom of the ocean.
How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles.
How do you tell if a loaf of bread has Down Syndrome?
It has an extra crumb-osome.
Most people think an octopus has 8 legs.
Actually, they have 6 legs and 2 arms. How can you tell which are the arms?
Hit it on the head. The two that go up to the head when he says "Owwww" are his arms.
