Beverage

Beverage Jokes

So I had an idea: you and a friend go bar (pub (whatever you call it)) hopping and propose to said friend in each one so everyone buys you free drinks and you get drunk and have a great time.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Little Johnny is smokin' hard, The sun looks like Mountain Dew.

If sheā€™s old enough to smoke, Sheā€™s old enough to choke.

If sheā€™s old enough to pee, Sheā€™s old enough for me.

My friend asked me why I havenā€™t had milk in six years.

I told him my dad never came back with it.

A guy walks into a restaurant and orders turtle soup. The waiter hollers, "One turtle soup!"

A moment later, the guy calls the waiter over and says, "Iā€™ve changed my mind, I would like pea soup." The waiter hollers, "Hold the turtle, and make it pea!"

Little Johnny said he wanted a coffee, so his mom said he can have one.

He got an espresso, not knowing "depresso" came with it.