Best jokes
What’s the best air to breathe if you want to be rich? Millionaire.
What's it like to have the best daughter in the world? You'll have to ask grandma!
When does a computer function best? When it listens to its motherboard.
Nun's worst holiday? Norfolk.
Nun's best holiday? Bangkok.
Germany is the best!
Are your forehead and your hairline best friends because they look like they go way back?
Best chick ever.
Call me at 6969696969.
School is the best!
I tried my best to think of some puns, but I'm gonna have tibia honest: I don't have any puns left, but I'm pretty sternum, so I'll think of a few puns here and there. It took a lot of spine to do this.
What is the best part of a turkey? The drumstick!
I thought I had the best K/D ratio in my fighter jet on Battlefield, then I heard about Mohammed Atta.
Why are emo kids the best jumpers?
Because they never fall down.
I don't joke about 9/11 because I lost my dad. He was the best pilot I ever knew.
For me, the best part of depression is remaining charming around strangers but saving the misery for the ones who love you.
Which is the best sport at making fat people lose weight?
Canned hunting.
Stephen Hawking's best subjects were Physics and Maths. His worst was P.E.
What is Stephen Hawking's best side?
The left.
Me: *opens a bag of hot Cheetos in class*
All my friends: Hey bro, can I have some?
People I don't know: Please lemme have some. PLEASE, I'll be your best friend!
People I say no to: (⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)
What do you give a dog with a fever?
Mustard, it's the best thing for a hot dog!
What is the best way to make a leaf?
Go down, back around, and stir up a tree. Make it spin, watch again. Oven baking, ding, we're done!