Being jokes
How can a gay man that is unemployed be productive in the workplace?
Give a blowjob to other gay men in the workplace for money.
What animal can not be trusted?
A lion 🦁.
Everyone: "Wow, you're so nice and perfect! Your life must be great!"
*Reality of having depression* Me: "Oh yeah, I guess. 😀"
Why can't orphans be gay? They don't know their daddy.
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they got nobody to call "daddy."
I just took an orange soda bath this morning. The next thing I knew, it turned out to be a river of Orange Crush.
"Love is a good thing, never be embarrassed by it."
What will happen if someone kicks you right in the balls?
You will be like, "Ow, my nuts!"
Why is Mars red and not orange? Because it would be too bright.
Doctor: I’m so sorry, sir, but you only have a couple months left.
The sir: My children will be devastated.
Doctor: But I have a shot that can change that.
The sir: Whatever it takes.
*Suppressed gunshots*
You know what would be the best last thing to say before you die? "No, you certainly can't." JFK's assassin certainly can!
Slade must be WiFi... because I’m not feeling a CONNECTION.
Why can't an orphan be in a Scream movie?
It's always someone you know.
Your hairline and the universe have one thing in common: they’re yet to be discovered.
Why is an orphan good at being naughty?
Because they don't have no one to tell them off.
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they can't call anyone their dad.
Why can't you be gay and in a wheelchair?
Because you can't be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.
What do you say to an upset German?
Quit being such a sauerkraut!
Why can't orphans be robbers?
Because they're not wanted.
Texas be like, "We vote to freeze ourselves!"