Being jokes

Life

  • My mom: Your life could be worse. You could be Tracy Latimer.

    Me: I wish I were Tracy Latimer, then someone would kill me.

    Gender

  • What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common? There used to be two of them, but now it's a sensitive subject.

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  • Chandelier

  • What do I and a brand new chandelier have in common?

    One of these days, we’re both gonna be hanging from the ceiling.

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  • Suicide

  • A depressed man buys a gun for suicide, but then thinks, "maybe I shouldn't be doing this," and asks a friend for help. He returns with a rope.

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  • Condom

  • Why can't a citizen in communist China, especially a Chinese male who is between 18-29 years old, buy a box of condoms in a drug store in communist China?

    Because the condom would be too big for the penis of Chinese men in communist China.

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  • Orphan

  • When you see an orphanage bully, remind them that no matter how powerful they are, they will never be as strong as their dads... Oh wait, they don't have a dad.

    Roblox

  • Roblox jokes be like: hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm I should create a game.

    *Creates game* bruh my game got to thousand hundred 700,000 likes!

    😄😄😄

    Roblox

  • Once Roblox popped up in my server, be like, "Roblox, what are you doing?"

    Me: "What the heck?" Me: "How did I get in your server?"

    Roblox: "You've been banned for just cheating!"

    Chuck Norris

  • The inspiration for Chuck Norris to be in Walker, Texas Ranger is by decoding each of the letters in the title.

    Walker, Texas Ranger = Wrangler, Karate, Sex!

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  • Rape

  • Did you hear about the German girl being raped by 10 men? She shouted, "nein, nein," so one of them left.

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  • Yo mama

  • The Yo Mama song to end all yo mama jokes.

    If you know what song this is parodying, you get a cookie.

    Well, it’s a oooh, yo mama.

    Ohhh, Yo Mama.

    oh wop oh wop...YO MAMA!

    Yo mama so fat, she gotta bathe in Sea World.

    Well, it’s a oooh, yo mama.

    Ohhhh, YO MAMA!

    Oh woo ohhh, YO MAMA!

    Yo mama so slow she took 9 months to get the joke.

    Your own motheeer makes me giggle.

    Her struggling to do taaaasks, see her belly wiggle.

    HEY!

    Yo mama so fat she on both sides o’the family.

    Yo mama so inbred her own fam’ly tree

    Looks like a spider web an’ yo mama so hairy

    I thought it was King Kong I saw, that bitch is scary.

    Yo mama so dumb a kid said “gimme a fag”

    And in response she kidnapped Ricardo in a giant bag.

    Yo mama so blind, she drove through puppies in a blunder

    I swear I almost thought the driver was Stevie Wonder.

    Yo mama so old, she’s nostalgic for the big bang.

    Drier than Sahara, that crusty old thang.

    Well, it’s a oooh, yo mama.

    Ohhh, Yo Mama.

    oh wop oh wop...YO MAMA!

    Yo Mama so fat her picture still printing out.

    Well, it’s a oooh, yo mama.

    Ohhhh, YO MAMA!

    Oh woo ohhh, YO MAMA!

    Yo mama so ugly I thought you had two dads.

    MMMMMMM

    ahhhhhh

    ohhhohoh

    Your own motheeer, your own motheeeeer’s pussy is tight.

    It’s not too dryyy or weeet it’s just right.

    Hey Mama!

    I fucked her so hard, the bitch done passed out

    but not before I creamed all over her and shout

    “I’M FUCKING THESE MOMS ALL THE WAY TO HEAVEN!

    Don’t care if she’s 20 or 77!

    I’m doing all the moms all over the worl’

    Even if they weren’t ‘riginally born a girl.

    A pussy’s a pussy no matter who its from

    Don’t care if that woman is smart or dumb!”

    That’s the truth there, baby! Even if

    yo mama too stupid to tell apart her own kid

    or if she’s so fugly, she’s the reason why

    Helen Keller, poor soul, went deaf and blind.

    I want to fuck every MILF on Earth

    it don’t matter how much her ass is worth

    or if she’s so poor, coal on Christmas is a treasure

    Would I fuck her anyway? It would be my pleasure.

    My body count so high can’t nobody top me

    She said, “I’ll call you Freddie Mercury cause I want you to rock me.”

    I said, “aiight bet! Can’t nobody stop me!”

    Well, it’s a oooh, yo mama.

    Ohhh, Yo Mama.

    oh wop oh wop...YO MAMA!

    But yo mama still so poor Africans donate to her!

    Expectation

  • I apologize if those jokes didn't meet your expectations. Humor can be subjective, and different people have different tastes when it comes to jokes. I'll try my best to share a few more jokes with you:

    Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!

    What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!

    Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!

    What did one hat say to the other hat? You stay here, I'll go on ahead!

    Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!

    How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!

    Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they'd be called bagels!

    What did one wall say to the other wall? I'll meet you at the corner!

    Why don't eggs tell jokes? They might crack up!

    What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!

    I hope these bring a bit more amusement. Let me know if there's anything else I can assist you with!

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