Being jokes
Here are 20 jokes for you:
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
What did one wall say to the other wall? I'll meet you at the corner!
Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers? He'll stop at nothing to avoid them!
How does a bee style its hair? With a honeycomb!
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs!
Why don't eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up!
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!
What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner is on me!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they would be bagels!
Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems!
How does a computer get drunk? It takes screenshots!
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bull-dozer!
I hope these jokes brought a smile to your face! Let me know if you'd like to hear more.
Hi! Welcome to Papa John's abortion clinic, where yesterday's meat is today's treat. How may I be of service?
If rape was about power, then my electric bill would be a positive balance.
If I was any more inbred, I'd be a sandwich.
Being a hooker shouldn't be illegal.
It's like having an Airbnb for your dick.
My friend in a wheelchair is autistic and tried to fight me, so I said: "If you wanna fight me, I'll run up the stairs, and by the time you get up the stairs, I'll already be down the stairs waiting," and he started crying.
It's better being depressed and suicidal than being happy, know why? Happiness never lasts forever.
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they can't call anyone their dad.
Why can't people eat pizza? Because they will be unavailable.
Caution: Looking at your hairline can cause you to be delirious and have hallucinations.
If I measured your forehead, it would be 100,000,000,000,000,000 miles long.
Your hairline and forehead must be friends, because they go way back further than the universe.
Chuck Norris came up with the name for Walker, Texas Ranger in sheer brilliance. You can arrange each letter for the name of the show to display the true name being "Wrangler Karate Sex!"
Warner Brothers have made a new Superman movie with Superman being black.
This new Superman's nickname is the "Man of Steel" but it's spelled s-t-e-a-l.
When you're 34, it'll be 420 months before you turn 69 years old.
Why can't orphans be criminals?
Because they're not wanted.
Why did the basketball player not get on the bus?
Because he couldn’t be caught travelling! 😂
Me: What do we need from there? I have a few things to do before I head out to the store, and then I will be home to pick up the stuff.
Random person: What stuff? 🤨
Me: What?
The person: You said you’re going to pick up “the stuff”!!! What do you mean by that?!
Me: Colourful flamingo fart.
What are the odds of you being in a relationship that is going on in the next few months?
More random keyboard words made into sentences:
This was a joke that was made by someone who had never been to the game before, but who was the first person to make it into a game of game with the intention of being able to play the first person who played it.