Being jokes

A German soldier is walking down the street during a hail storm when a lady suddenly falls over after being hit. He, along with a few others, walk over to her. One man asks, "What happened?" and the soldier replies, "Hail hit her."

Crucifixion - only one guy who nailed it... at least Jesus didn't get screwed over, but I bet he was pretty cross about being forced to hang around.

A bully chokes me. I simply say, "Joke's on you, I like being choked!"

I like women how I like my hair dryer: locked in a closet most of the time and only being used to blow me dry.

I had a dream about the whole ocean being filled with orange soda.

Turns out it was a Fanta sea.

Of course Jesus wasn't a virgin! He obviously liked being nailed!

What's the best part of being a pedophile? You will never have a wife.

What's the best thing about being a pedophile? You can choose the fit profession where you find kids most.

What's the hardest part about being a paedophile?

Trying to fit in.

What's better than winning gold at the Paralympics?

Not being retarded.

Your life.

What's the hardest part about being a pedophile?

Fitting in.

I can't stand being in a wheelchair.

What is the hardest part of twerking?

Being black.