What do you say to your pony when it's being wild?
Stop horsing around!
Child: Mom, someone told me you talk like an owl.
Teacher: Who?
Child: Oh, it is true, you do talk like an owl!
Why do you let your dads sleep so they don't get grumpy and eat your dinner?
My 3 year old sister kept saying, "I like your cut, G." Every time she does, I dodge and close my eyes, but she's the one who always ends up running.
What do you say when a person trips?
You say, "Why you trippin'?"
Why did the cheetah always cheetah against the lion?
Because she knew the lion was always lion.
Me: I know why you don't have friends.
Kid: Why?
Me: Because you can't even figure that out.
Why did the turkey cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn't chicken!
Why can’t you trust an emo kid?
'Cause they always leave you hanging.
When someone keeps talking while you are trying to focus on something, what is the rudest thing you can say to them?
SHUT UP!!!
Yo mama so stupid, when I said, "Go deep," she dug a hole in the field.
What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?
Unlike the porcupine, the pricks are on the inside.
What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? Unlike the porcupine, the pricks are on the inside.
What's the difference between crazy people and regular people?
We don't live in their heads.
There was a new kid in my school. The first thing the teacher said was, "Me, you, the basement NOW!"
I bullied a handicap today.
What is he gonna do? Stand up for himself?
I take all my anger out on orphans. Why?
Because they have no parents to run to.
You are annoying lolllllllll.
Bored?
Burn an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Your kid is so annoying, he makes his Happy Meal cry.
