Say this when you answer a spam call... Hi welcome to bobs taco shack and funeral home. Wear yesterdays grief is todays beef.
What did the policeman shout to the cow running away? Get to the ground beef
What do you call it when a cow gets disciplined by her parents? Grounded beef.
(Phone call) This is Franks funeral home and grill where yesterday’s grief is todays beef. How may we help you ?
why don't chicken and sheep get along? because they have beef between them
What is a vegetarian's favorite song?
No beef
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
One cow asks another cow, "Are you afraid of mad cow disease?" The other cow says, "Why should I be? I'm a helicopter."
What do you call a cow that skydives without a parachute? Ground Beef
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
When someone asks you for a beef (fight) just say your a vegetarion.
A man who desperately wanted to be good after serving time in prison was visited by an Angel "You want to change? You can still enter heaven on two conditions ..you must bet on the horses with any money you have and pass your winnings to someone less fortunate and you must never hold on to any beef . " The Angel then disappeared. The man did as was told and became generous and kind ..as he emerged from the betting office with all his money... he would pass every penny of it all to a deserving person..each and everytime. He ,however couldn't seem to avoid meat and would still eat it no matter what . When he died the Angel came back for him .. "But I'm undeserving I can't come with you" he said .. "Yes you can" replied the Angel , "you gave all your stake ( steak) away"
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field. 2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon. 3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.” 4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop. 5. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river. 6. Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils. 7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope. 8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves. 9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match. 10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee. 11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, “mini-soda”). 12. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted. 13. Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff. 14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat. 15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball. 16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing. 17. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.
A cow was standing in a corn field. The chicken walked by and said annoyingly, "what do I see here? Corn beef!?"
What time is it when you get home can you walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school 🏫
My acquaintance WILLIAM
You can find perfectly cooked Kobe in a Japanese restaurant, but you can only find burnt Kobe in calabasas
What do you call a cow with no legs? Grounded beef.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.. What do you call a dog with no legs? No point in calling, he won't come anyway :(
