Beauty jokes

Motherhood is like a fairy tale, but in reverse. You start out in a beautiful ball gown and end up in stained rags cleaning up after little people.

Little Johnny's neighbor just had a baby. He got invited to dinner with his neighbor. Little Johnny's dad said if he mentioned "ears" he will get a spank.

So Johnny looked in the bassinet. They were talking about the new baby. Johnny's mum said, "What beautiful eyes."

"That is great," said little Johnny, "because he will be stuffed if he needed glasses."

Do you wanna eat makeup, 'cause you're not pretty on the inside?

Your hairline is so far back that I hate it! 🤣

Are you a Pikachu?

Because you are SHOCKINGLY beautiful!

Pokemon

What’s the difference between an orphan and a flower?

One is beautiful.

So, two people are on a date and the guy says, "Wow, you are so beautiful!"

Then the girl says, "You just want to have sex!"

Then the guy adds, "SMART TO!"

Words can’t describe how beautiful you are.

But numbers can. (Lol)

Beauty is blind? Ya damn right, 'cause that's what happened when she saw your ass.

What do you say if you want to borrow your black sister's foundation? "Got any lighter shades?"

Bro has to get a fringe to cover up the big, increasing hairline.

Your hairline goes so far back you have to wear sunscreen.

I saw a girl with blond hair. She was sexy and beautiful. I thought she was the most hottest girl I ever saw, so I ran up to her feeling hot.

The wedding was so beautiful, even the cake was tiers.

If I had a nickel for every time I saw someone as beautiful as you, I’d still only have five cents.

What do you call someone who’s blond, beautiful, and listens to what you’re saying, but only hears what they want?

Womxn

Your skin's so bright you could be used as a highlighter.

But you could get plastic surgery and look 20 years younger. With that, no one will suspect you!

As you can see here, Jessie is wearing a lot of concealer.

Jessie?

May our days be abundant, a dance of delight, May I navigate life with courage, taking flight. May our journey be a beauty, a blessing so sweet, May I celebrate friendships, where hearts and souls meet.

May our nights be bright, with laughter and cheer, May we live with love, eliminating every fear. May I grow in kindness, a serenade of grace, May our lives be a marvel, a splendid embrace.