1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field. 2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon. 3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.” 4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop. 5. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river. 6. Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils. 7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope. 8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves. 9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match. 10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee. 11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, “mini-soda”). 12. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted. 13. Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff. 14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat. 15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball. 16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing. 17. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.
How do you know if a rapper is hungry?
They start dropping BEATS at the dinner table
What did the mic say to the rapper?
Don’t DROP me, bro!
If your kid beats up a orphan , what are they going to do? what tell their parents.
My friend told me she had a good joke and it beat all mine. I said "haha that is funny"
Q: What did the Jewish person say when he beat me in a race?
A: Eat my dust
How do you beat Hellen Keller in musical chairs
You move the chairs
why does aaron chug beer on a wednesday? because his dad beats him every single day because he has scoliosis
What do you do when your bored
Beat up an orphan what are they going to do tell their parents
What did Michale Jackson say to the kid sitting on his lap Just beat it.
Me and my wife love playing table tennis. I couldn’t win all day, but when it got dark I managed to beat her. I don’t know how the police found out so quickly
Why did the rapper become a chef?
Because they love serving up HOT BEATS
What did the beat say to the rapper?
"You're OFF RHYTHM, but I'll give you a hand"
Why did the rapper open a bakery?
Because they wanted to bake some BEATS
Why was the rapper so good at math?
Because they could always count on their BEATS
How does a rapper clean their house?
With a BEAT BRUSH
Why did the rapper become a chef?
Because he knew how to MIX UP some BEATS
I'd insult BlessedBrian, but it seems NATURE beat me to it
