Beat jokes
My friend told me to beat that pussy up... so why is the local animal control at my door?
Yo mama so fat that she needs her belly button to beat her home by 15 min.
What’s a rapper’s favorite MUSICAL NOTE?
G major.
The egg that beat Kylie Jenner.
How do you make Alabama cookies?
Put them in a big bowl and beat for three hours.
Memes
Hollow Knight Meme
What is the best Christmas present ever? A broken drum! You just can't beat it!
What do you call an angry reindeer? RUDE-olph!
What is Santa's favorite breakfast? Snowflakes!
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? Tinsel-itis!
What’s the difference between a prostitute and cancer?
A prostitute can beat my dick any day, but a prostitute can’t beat cancer.
How do you beat Hellen Keller in musical chairs?
You move the chairs.
What do you do when you're bored?
Beat up an orphan, what are they going to do, tell their parents?
What do blind kids and orphans have in common? I fucking hate their whiny asses and beat them up.
Why did I beat up the orphan? Because he was a whiny bitch who wouldn't shut the fuck up.
Why does Aaron chug beer on a Wednesday?
Because his dad beats him every single day because he has scoliosis.
Me and my wife love playing table tennis. I couldn’t win all day, but when it got dark, I managed to beat her. I don’t know how the police found out so quickly.
Why did the rapper become a chef?
Because he knew how to mix up some beats!
Why did the rapper become a chef?
Because they love serving up HOT BEATS!
How do you know if a rapper is hungry?
They start dropping BEATS at the dinner table.
How does a rapper clean their house?
With a BEAT BRUSH!
What did the mic say to the rapper?
"Don’t DROP me, bro!"
My friend told me she had a good joke and it beat all mine. I said, "Haha, that is funny!"
If your kid beats up an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?