A man walks into a bar with a slab of concrete under his arm and says "A beer please! and one for the road!"
A priest, a rapist, a pedophile and a homosexual walk into a bar...
He orders a drink.
What did the blind man fight in the bar?
The coat rack
Kelly Clarkson and Ian Watkins of the Lostprophets both walk into a bar. The bartender asked, "Hitting on some 2-year-olds today?" It may have been an innocuous question, if it weren't for the fact that the bartender is Chris Hansen.
Indian guy and American guy in a wheelchair met in a Bar for drinks. American guy got drunk and fell on the sidewalk. Indian guy got drunk and walked away.
A grasshopper jumps into a bar.
The bartender says "we've got a drink named after you."
The grasshopper says "seriously? Why would you name a drink named Callum?"
Guy walks into a bar. Sees a hot girl. Walks up to her and says "your getting laid tonight" She replies "what are you some sort of psychic" He says "No i'm just stronger than you".
An SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, "Can I join you?"
so heres the joke, A bear walks into a bar and sits down and then....then..........then................................zzzz
A man walks into a bar and say I'm feeling depressed what do you have to cheer me up? The bartender replied: a shotgun
A skeleton walks into a bar. Orders a beer and a mop.
A nun walked into a bar with her clothes on inside out. The bartender asked her about it and she replied, "Its a bad habit"
A man walks into a bar with a 44. Magnum and yells who the fuck fucked my wife. The bartender answers "Mate you ain't got enough bullets."
Steven hawking walks into a bar, the bartender says... WAITTTT WHATTT
The Barman says, "We don't serve time travelers in here."
A time traveler walks into a bar.
2 men ran into a bar, you would have thought after the first one hit it the second one would have seen it
A piece of toast and a hard boiled egg walked into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve breakfast here."
A grasshopper walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender says, "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper looks confused and says, "Oh really? You have a drink named 'Bob'??"
The Trump cocktail. Take a large glass and fill it with an ounce of everything behind the bar. Top it with whipped cream and a cherry. Now for the hard part: finding a Mexican to pay for it.
What did the drunk women said to the man after leaving the bar? Alcohol-you later
