3 vampires walk into a bar. The first one orders a Bloody Mary. The second orders a Bloody Mary. The bartender turns to the third and asks “a Bloody Mary?”
The vampire shakes his head. “Hot water for me”
“Hot water?”
“I found a tampon out back and want to make tea”
A block of gold walked into a bar, the bartender said ‘AU, get out!”
A man walks into a bar with a slab of concrete under his arm and says "A beer please! and one for the road!"
An SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, "Can I join you?"
So a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink, the bartender says “I’ll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta joke” so the guy says “alreight so a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink” the bartender says “I’ll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta joke” so the guy says “ so a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink” the bartender says”I’ll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta joke” so the guy says” so a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink” the bartender says” ok here you go” so he gives the guy a drink, so he gives the guy a drink, so he gives the guy a drink
What’s the name of the band in the gay bar?
A: Beers for Queers
Steven hawking walks into a bar, the bartender says... WAITTTT WHATTT
What did the drunk women said to the man after leaving the bar? Alcohol-you later
a man walks into a bar and ends up with a concussion. maybe if he looked where he was going, he wouldn’t have hit that pole.
whats long, hard and slimy? A bar of soap
A jumper cable walked into a bar. The bartender said, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything!"
A priest, a rapist, a pedophile and a homosexual walk into a bar...
He orders a drink.
Hi guys, so today I have not thought of a joke, and I'm not really sure what to do so I thought I would do kinda a blog sort of thing so hope you enjoy and you don't have to read this!
So I woke up this morning and heard this weird noise and it was my dad building me a new gymnastics bar so I can have uneven bars which I am so excited about! And I am so glad that you guys have been nice and liking my jokes and stuff but also, make sure to comment below if you want to tell me what kind of jokes you want and what you want me to do and also, feel free to talk to me! Love y'all!!!
Q: Why do Norwegian ships have bar codes on them?
A: So when they come into port they can Scan-Da-Navy-In!
A dog walked into a tavern and said, "I can't see a thing. I'll open this one." The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
A man and a giraffe walk into a bar, the man orders a beer one for him and one for the giraffe. After they finish their drinks the giraffe falls over and the man gets his stuff and heads for the door. The bartender says "Stop! you can't leave that thing lying on the floor" The man says "Mate, that's not a lion, it's a giraffe".
Guy walks into a bar. Sees a hot girl. Walks up to her and says "your getting laid tonight" She replies "what are you some sort of psychic" He says "No i'm just stronger than you".
