A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to his dick.
The bartender asks him why.
And the pirate says:
"Argh, It's driving me nuts."
Two mates walk into a bar Mate 1 : Shit! look at that spider over there Mate 2 : Whateverrrrrrr Mate 1 : No, seriously it's bloody massive Mate 2 : (Turns around) Shit thats huge, I thought you were Joking Mate 1 : No I'm Fred King, Jo King's brother ;-)
so a women walked into a bar. there was a man she went up to him and said your cute. he said yeah and you don't deserve equal rights.
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A bear walks into bar and ask the barkeep "Can i have a grilled...............cheese" and the barkeep asks the bear "Whats with the big pause" the bears says "Well I'm a bear"
A horse a fox and a bunny join together and make a rock band they started doing tiny gigs but they got famous and went on tour they all got so famous it went to their heads and the band disbanded the fox made his and bunny made her own the horse was sad that the band was no more so he went to a bar and the bartender asked why the long face
Aj died in a bar
The end
3 jewish people walk into a bar.
A man enters a bar with some friends, and they all sit down to a drink. After not too long, a man with glasses comes through the front door saying "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" When no one listens, he shrugs, and everyone watches him go up the stairs. Ten seconds later, he comes back in through the door, again saying "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" Everyone is amazed, and a few people leave to go fly with him. He keeps coming back into the bar, bringing more and more patrons to join him. The man at the bar is about to join in when the bartender finally sighs. "For the last time Superman, get out of my bar, you're drunk and the only person here that can fly!" The man with glasses frowns. "Where did all the others go, then?"
Sixteen Sodium particles walk into a bar followed by Batman.
A bicurious man goes to a gar bar A gay man offers him a drink The bi man explains he doesnt know if hes gay or not Thats fine he says lets just have a drink The gay man asks him for a dance and he explains again he isnt sure if hes gay or not. Eventually the gay man invites him to go home with him to hang out as friends. They get to his house and the gay man says, do you fancy having sex? He isnt sure so the gay man explains ill push in slow and at any point you want to stop make animal sounds and if you like it starr singing.so they get to it and the gay man pushs in slowly, the bi man bursts out "MOOOOO MOOOOO MOOOOOOVVVEE CCLOSSEEERRRR
A blind man walks into a bar, and asks the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bartender replies with, "I'm blonde, the man working next to me is blonde, the woman next to you is blonde, and the fat guy behind you is blonde." Then says "Do you really wanna tell the blonde joke?" the blind guy responds with "No I don't wanna tell it that many times.
3 guys walk into a bar the fourth one ducks
A Weasle walks into a bar the bartender says "Wow I've never served a weasle before, what can I get you?" "Pop", goes the weasle.
Q: Why do Norwegian ships have bar codes on them?
A: So when they come into port they can Scan-Da-Navy-In!
A nun walked into a bar with her clothes on inside out. The bartender asked her about it and she replied, "Its a bad habit"
A feminist walks into a bar. Her friend says "oh my god your shoulders are broad!" another woman says "are you sure it's a woman?"
When we were visiting the hoover dam. I started to get a bit hungry. I asked my parents, "Wheres the dam snack bar?"
A man walks into a bar, and says "OUCH".
2 deer walk out of a gay bar one says to the other, i blew like 20 bucks in there
