Bank jokes
"_____ abortion clinic, you rape it, we scrape it.
_____ sperm bank, you spank it, we bank it."
I had to get my dog. Is it a tree? Was your time and I had fun today after dinner. I had...
Why did the football coach go to the bank?
To get his quarterback!
What’s the difference between a mediocre thief and professional thief?
The mediocre thief will say “give me all your money!”
And a professional thief will say “sign here please.”
What time eeeeeee?
Why did the credit card go to jail?
'Cuz it was guilty as charged!
I once went to the bank with some raisins because I wanted to set up a current account.
A man enters the bank and says, "Hi, I'm robbing you!" The man was arrested instantly.
An old lady in the bank told me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
The bank said go to the river bank. Oh, oh, oh, good fishy joke!
Did you hear about the dyslexic wanna-be bank robber? He walked in and yelled, "HANDS UP, THIS IS A MOTHER STICKING F##K UP!" The lucky idiot got away because nobody could stop laughing!
I quit my job at the bank today. I lost interest.
Read the next line.
Read the previous line.
Want to know how to keep an idiot in suspense???
Where do fish keep their money?
In a riverbank!
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are robbing a bank. The police are soon after them, so they hide in a bunch of barrels.
The police arrive and search the area. They come over to the barrel where the brunette is hiding and kicks it. The brunette says, "Woof."
"Oh, it's just a dog," says the police officer, and then kicks the second barrel where the redhead is hidden. The redhead says, "Meow."
"Oh, it's just a cat," says the officer, then kicks the last barrel where the blonde is hidden. The blonde says, "Potato."
Bank owner: If you want to start a bank account, I need your name.
Guy: Robin
Bank owner: Your last name?
Guy: Debank
Bank owner: Robin Debank?
Guy: Put your hands up and give me all the money!
Yaxaas?
What time does the man go to the bank?
8 AM.
Why do people name a kid "Rob?" Because they want him to rob a bank so they could adopt new kids to lock in their basement for a late-night toy.