Bald jokes
Yo, your hairline is so small that you're bald.
You know you’re going bald when you use more toothpaste than shampoo.
Seeing so many balding college students is so sad. Like, why the fuck is your hairline graduating before you?!?
You're so bald, I rub your head to see into the future.
People say, "I like your cut G." Which is when you get a fresh cut. But I guess when you go bald, we can say, "Like your forehead, G."
I know it's really, really, really, really bad.
They didn't have a category for Bald, so I chose the Bald Eagle.
Did you know that bald people have an endless forehead?
You're so bald, when you wear a turtleneck, you look like one!
My name is Devonair.
When I get a haircut, it's always bald.
Kids make fun of me, they call me "dang-near bald head."
My name is Devonair *dev-on-near*
I always thought they were making fun of me because of my name pronounced near.
Why are bald eagles bald? Because you're bald!
Bald Eagle.
Your hairline is so bald, Mr. Clean even said it's bald!
How are a bald eagle and a bald man similar?
Because they both have eyes.
What did the bald man exclaim when he received a comb for a present?
What type of bird does not have feathers on itself?
A bald eagle.
What is the worst thing about licking a bald fanny?
Putting the nappy on afterwards.
I looked at you, and you were bald until I got slapped up by Will Smith to the back of your head and saw the Great Wall of China.
You're so bald, Bob Hope would refer to you as "grandpa."
I asked my dad, "Why did you paint rabbits on your bald head?"
He replied, "Because I thought it would look like hares."
"You get no bitches," said the man to the 60-year-old redneck virgin guy who is obese and balding with "Trump" stuff plastered all over his pickup truck.
Trump: Caillou, can you please stop whining? That squirrel didn’t just eat our pizza, he also ditched your dad, and he’s your stepdad now.
Caillou: Why I’m bald, Trumpy?
Trump: I don’t know, but what I do know is that you’re a massive shit stain.