Bald jokes
I’m not saying you’re going bald, but you’ll find Waldo before you find your hairline.
What’s ten feet long and bald?
The conga line in the cancer ward.
What is a bald eagle's favorite dog breed?
A beagle!
What animal should wear a wig?
A bald eagle!
Why did the bald man paint rabbits on his head?
Because from a distance, they looked like hare.
Memes
What bird doesn’t need a comb?
Bald eagles.
You're so bald that your hairline is receding faster than my bank account after a trip to Las Vegas.
I'm bald.
People say, "I like your cut G." Which is when you get a fresh cut. But I guess when you go bald, we can say, "Like your forehead, G."
I know it's really, really, really, really bad.
Your nan's bald.
You know you’re going bald when you use more toothpaste than shampoo.
Why would hunting a bald eagle in America be a bad idea?
Because it's ill-eagle.
How are a bald eagle and a bald man similar?
Because they both have eyes.
Why don't Bald Eagles like fast food? It always runs away!
Two bald dudes were pulling each other's hair.
Why is the bald eagle bald?
Because it has no hair.
It has feathers. LOL.
There was once a grandfather. He had very little hair, and he lived in a forest.
On his death bed, he was fully bald. So he told his children, "You see my head? I have no hair. All of my hair has been wiped, and I hope this forest doesn't experience the same. Children, every time a tree is cut in this forest, plant a new one in its place."
So for years, and to this day, that forest still stands, each tree being replanted. All because of an old man and his re-seeding hairline.
Me: Why do you need to use shampoo when you are already bald? 🤣
Bald Eagle.
I asked my dad, "Why did you paint rabbits on your bald head?"
He replied, "Because I thought it would look like hares."