Back jokes

Why did he go to the chiropractors?

To get his spine fixed.

Why wasn’t the orphan able to finish his cereal?

His parents never brought back the milk.

A man went into a library to get a book on how to commit suicide.

The librarian said, "No, you won't bring it back."

Hello everyone! I just came back! How are things going?

So an orphan goes to the store and gets a bunch of cartons of milk.

The cashier goes, "Woah, why so much?"

The orphan goes, "My dad never came back with the milk, so, well, here we are!"

Mom: It's time for sleep.

Baby: Is that what you think, huh?

Mom: *gives baby pacifier*

Baby: Nice try, hobo.

Mom: Well, I'll come back later to see if he's gone asleep.

*few hours later*

Baby: *still awake*

Mom: Why IS HE NOT ASLEEP?!

Baby: Lol, I told you nice try haha.

Family are together playing charades.

Me: "50 Shades of Grey!" Yes, I'm so good at charades! Put your shirt back on, Nan!

Kid: Aye, Mum, I'mma do something Dad could never do.

Mum: And that is?

*Kid walks out.*

*Kid comes back in with milk.*

Mum: I'mma beat ya ass!

"Give me 5 cents and I’ll grant you a wish."

Ok.

"Thank you, what is your wish?"

I wish for my 5 cents back.

Remember back in the day when your TV wouldn't work so you'd bang it a few times?

I tried that with my dishwasher, but unfortunately, she ended up pregnant...

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Bill Cosby.

Bill Cosby who?

Never mind, I’ll come back when you’re sleeping.

Your hairline goes further back than your mum's divorce.

Your hairline goes as far back as the cavemen. Your forehead is also as deep as the cave.

Yo momma's so ugly that when she walked into a Haunted Mansion, she walked back out with a job application.

Son: Hi Dad, I'm Son.

Dad: Hi Son, I'm Leaving You.

Years later:

Dad still did not come back.

What’s one thing Obama proved during his presidency?

No matter how far a brotha gets in life, he’s still going to have the cops on his back.

Your hairline goes so far back you can see a full world scale map in your forehead reflection.

Why do orphans always come back?

Because I love cock.

Today, me and my best friend went to the Grand Canyon. He was taking up all the space by the edge, and I told him to back up. R.I.P. to him.

What’s the worst part about eating vegetables? Putting them back in the wheelchair.