Aviation jokes
My uncle died on nine eleven... he was the best pilot in Iraq.
(amazing pick up line) Yoo, what if we got matching tattoos? You get two towers and I get a plane, because I crashed right into your life!
A plane is going to crash. There are four passengers and only three parachutes. All the staff are safe and are gone, leaving the passengers. Ryan Reynolds is the first. He says, "My fans need me," and jumps. Donald Trump takes another and says, "I am the smartest president," and jumps, leaving one. There is a pope and a boy left. The pope says, "Child, my life is over and yours has just begun, take the last parachute." The boy replies, "Don't worry - Donald took my backpack."
Are suicide bombers taught properly how to fly, or...
Are they just given a quick crash course?
The terrorists said over the intercom, "We're coming up to our destination, so we can't go over it, we can't go under, we have to go through it."
I would be smiling if I were the pilot
What bee is terrible at flying? Kobe.
What do you call an LGBTQ+ plane?
A biplane.
What do you call a Muslim and an Arab in a plane?
Pilots, you racist fuckers!
Jim and Allyn are 2 mates in the Air Force. They were paired up for a training exercise. They got up into the air and Jim said, "Okay Allyn, your helmet can control the missile when launched from the jet. Go ahead and test fire a missile and aim it at anything you want." Allyn fired the missile and had his eyes set on an abandoned building. Jim then said, "I also forgot, watch out for friendly fire." Allyn said "What?" as he looked over at Jim.
Why did the plane cross the sky?
To hit the Twin Towers...
My friends were the pilots on 9/11, they told me, "Bro, chill, it's just a prank!"
I'd make 9/11 jokes, but they'd just crash and burn.
We shouldn't joke about major tragedies. My dad died in 9/11, he was Saudi Arabia's best pilot.
Have I told you the joke about the airplane? Ah, forget it, it probably just went over your head.
When you realize the shuttle blew up.
Then you realize you're on the shuttle.
What did the plane say to the Twin Towers?
"Open wide, here comes the airplane!" 💀👌
Wanna know why the plane actually crashed?
Someone turned off flight mode.
(Or a kid just turned on airplane mode.)
My father, who flew the plane, couldn't have a funeral, he went everywhere.
My dad died in 9/11. He was a Muslim pilot.
What did the North tower say to the south tower? "Sorry, can't talk, got to catch a plane."