Asked jokes

I see 2 fighting with 3. "What's going on?" I ask. 5 responds: "The numbers are moving on up."

Ask me who Joe is.

Who is Joe?

JOE MAMA!

Michael J. Fox walks into an ice cream parlor.

The man behind the counter asks Michael, "Can I help you?"

Michael exclaims, "I would like an ice cream."

The man behind the counter asks, "What flavor?"

Michael says, "It doesn't matter what flavor, I'm gonna fucken drop it anyway."

I arrived at basketball and I asked little Jimmy if he brought the basketballs, and he said, "Nope, but I got two right here!"

A man walks into a bar and places a 12-inch man onto the counter as well as a small piano. The 12-inch man starts playing the piano really well.

The bartender asks the man where he got the 12-inch man. The man says there is a genie two blocks around the corner.

The bartender runs to the genie and makes a wish. The bartender comes back with 1 million ducks. The bartender says to the man, "That genie is dumb! I asked for 1 million bucks."

The man says, "Do you really think I asked for a 12-inch pianist?"

Yo mama so dumb, she asked how much a free sample was.

I saw a kid crying and asked him where his parents were. He started crying harder.

The ungrateful brat. I see why he is an orphan.

Son asks dad, "How much does marriage cost?"

Dad: "I don’t know, son. I’m still paying for it."

The teacher asked the class what they wanted to be when they grew up.

Johnny said when he grows up he's going to be a motherfucking hustler. He's going to have a wife and live in a big house in the country with maids and butlers and drive a Rolls-Royce, and he's also going to have an apartment in the city where his side bitch is going to live. He's going to buy her expensive jewelry, whatever she wants: cars, diamonds, clothes, shoes.

The teacher didn't know what to say, so she calls on Sally. "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

Sally said, "I want to be Johnny's bitch."

A girl is meeting this Muslim for a date, and she asks him, "So are you Indian?"

And the Muslim goes, "No, bitch, I ain't 7-Eleven, I'm 9/11!"

Someone asks a question: Who? Who asked? Boom, you"re done xxx.

Last week I felt so high and mighty I thought I could fly. I took one shot, puffed through my pipe, and jumped in the air on a trampoline. I woke up in heaven.

I asked an angel, "How did I die?"

"Well, little monkey, you thought your bed was a trampoline and you hit your head. Your mom called the doctor, and the doctor said you were dead."

My friend said that his book was getting boring and that he's gonna kill off some characters.

I asked him what his book was about and he said, "Oh, it's an autobiography."

A customer asked me to look at their hairline. I time traveled back to the dinosaurs.

The date is April 1st.

Somebody asks you what you are doing.

“I guess you could say I’m... fooling around ( ✧≖ ͜ʖ≖)“

Yo mama so Karen that when she went to hell, she asked Satan for the manager.

When it is quiet when you're having sex and you ask your partner to "Do the roar!"

I walk up to a kid. I ask where his parents are, and he started crying. Then I walked out of the orphanage.

Kid: Hey, why am I an orphan?

Adult: I don't know, ask your parents.

An orphan went up to Nikola Tesla and asked to travel in time. He then saw his parents put him in a building, saying, "You now live here!"