Bob Ross fighting in Vietnam. "The're in the happy little trees, shoot the happy little trees and bushes."
I got rejected from art school today so yeah
“Don’t sneeze”
Every time I was in the bathroom with my friends I would always tell them “Don’t sneeze” and when I did they just laughed so hard. And when we sneezed we laughed even harder.
Also,
“It dangles and swung” Language art quizzes are the best
What’s the most artistic fruit
Vincent mango
What did the two paintings say after a long battle? Lets call this one a draw
What did the paintings name their daughter? Palette
What do you call a sad, depressed artist? Anything but "Cows of Woe".
confucius man asy Full retard. it's an art a weapon and a lifestyle. once you go full retard there is no going back.
I was talking to a close friend that was Islamic.
He said he was being shipped to an amazing training.
I asked "where are you going"
He said "Camp Bin Laden"
I asked "what do they do there"
He answered "they got bomb training and hand to hand combat training. Plus the got arts and crafts."
I asked "what do you mean by arts and crafts?"
He said "see this towel on my head" I nodded "I made it out of boxer jokes"
A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."
"What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married 10 times?"
"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative. He kept telling me how great it was going to be. Husband #2 was in software services. He was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me. Husband #3 was from field services. He said everything checked out diagnostically, but he just couldn't get the system up. Husband #4 was in telemarketing. Even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver. Husband #5 was an engineer. He understood the basic process, but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method. Husband #6 was from finance and administration. He thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not. Husband #7 was in marketing. Although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it. Husband #8 was a psychologist. All he ever did was talk about it. Husband #9 was a gynecologist. All he did was look at it. Husband #10 was a stamp collector. All he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"
"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"
"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm going to get screwed!"
They laughed at my crayon drawing.
I laughed at their chalk outline.
A father and a son were painting pictures together, the son and father were drawing the exact same thing to a T and the son said "what happened to your hand?" looking at the scar tissue near the father's knuckle, the father replied with "you know what happened, you were there." the son continues to deny this until they both finish their paintings - they're exactly the same.
The father passes out for a few hours and wakes up to find that there's only one painting.
My dad was a master of his art; being compared to Houdini. Due to his skill in disappearing.
Why didn't the skeleton want to make art anymore? He didn't have the heart to put into it.
What's the difference between the real Jesus and a picture of him?
It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.
The saddest painting you will see is a mirror.
What's the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus?
A painting only takes one nail to be hanged.
What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common?
They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.
Two artists had an art contest. It ended in a draw.
