New York jokes
Why were the Twin Towers afraid of the New York Jets?
Because they are afraid of the jet.
What's the twin towers' favorite football team?
New York Jets.
I’m a god, and I’m here to flex on you bitches. My flight to New York on September 11th was rocky, but I lived.
Imagine dying on a plane, fr. At least try and respawn:/
What's Osama bin Laden's favorite football team? New York Jets!!!
Did you hear about the tourist that came to New York? Good, because they were a terrorist... When they were asked why they were traveling, they just mispronounced it.
What did a terrorist say when New York didn't want his food?
"Here Comes The Airplane!"
What do Philippe Petit and New York citizens have in common?
They both walk(ed) over the Twin Towers.
Who are the fastest readers in the world? New Yorkers. They went through 110 stories in under 10 seconds.
Why can't New York City play chess?
Because they lost 2 towers!
What time do terrorists arrive in New York City?
9:11 AM
You can play Jenga in two places now: New York and Miami (Chaplin Towers.) They probably have Jenga tournaments there every year.
A Scouser at ground zero just after the twin towers fell asks a passer-by, "What time is it, mate?"
An American replies, "That's a mad accent, where are you from?"
The Scouser says, "Liverpool."
The American says, "Oh, what state is that in?"
The Scouser looks around and says, "About the same state as this, mate, but what time is it?"
What does the cow say when it's going on holiday? - MOOOOOYORK.
What does Fortnite and real life have in common?
They both lost their tower.
What is the state of California best for? Screwing everything up!
What is the state of Florida for? Rednecks for days!
What is the state of Texas for? Guns!
What is the state of Utah for? Mormons and Pligs baby! (I hate all of the religious stuff!)
What is the state of Idaho for? Calling other people Ho's, mostly!
What is the state of Nevada for? Ever heard of gambling?
What is the state of Delaware for? Literally anything that isn't exciting!
What is the state of New York for? In my state of mind, it's a song! (If you don't get this one, look up the song of New York State of Mind)
When your plane heads for New York...
I walked up to some Arabs and said "Alawakba," then here came the second tower.
Why can't New Yorkers play chess?
Because they lost their towers.
Why didn’t the Twin Towers like their pizza?
Cause it was plain.
Ever since convicted New York State felon Donald John Trump has taken office, the Canada-US border has been a mess of tariffs, counter-tariffs and boycotts.
And where does it end? I just got served a salad with 500 Islands in the dressing instead of a thousand. The price was the same.