Ares jokes
Girls are like a bus; you might miss the first bus and catch the second bus.
How are Stephen Hawking and Kaepernick so much alike? They both don’t stand for the national anthem.
My mother wanted to test my responsibility and wanted me to cook dinner for the family to help me understand how it feels to constantly cook for a whole family. So, me with my horrible humor, decided to make a giant joke for when dinner time came around, and so I just got four plates and set them in front of my family and I then said, "Here you are, a fine African meal." Then everybody looked at me in disappointment, and then I continued to say, "What? Poor taste?"
Stop joking about suicide, it's not funny. You people must be so ignorant to be able to joke about such serious issues that you clearly are uneducated on.
So an orphan was crying in a corner in the dark. Then a man came over and asked, "Why are you crying?"
Then said, "Do you want me to get your parents?"
Hippity hoppity, women are property!
The more suicidal people there are, the fewer suicidal people there are.
Why are elephants scared of computers?
Because of the mouse.
My syndrome may be down, but my hopes are up!
Roses are red, violets are violet.
These are some of the greatest names ever: Dixie Normous, Dixie Rekt, Ka Monmi, Ice Wallow Kum, Dick Sinsider, Anita Biggerman.
I have a skeleTON of jokes, but none of them are very humorous.
Titanic was sinking.
Passenger: "How far are we from land?"
Captain: "Two miles."
Passenger: "Which direction?"
Captain: "Down."
Adopted kid: I made a big mistake!
Dad: You are one.
Roses are red, Burnt bodies are black.
You'd look great With a knife in your back.
Roses are red, violets are blue, this poem doesn’t make sense, washing machine.
If tomatoes are a fruit, does that mean ketchup is a smoothie?
I can’t hang out with an emo when they are sad? Why? Because it cuts deeply.
Why are graveyards so popular? Because people are always dying to get into them.
A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street, and they come to a kid playing in a sandbox. The priest says, "Hey, you wanna go screw that kid?"
To which the rabbi replies, "Out of what?"