Apple jokes
How many apples can you grow on a tree? All of them.
Q: What’s the difference between orphans and apples?
A: Apples get picked.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apples get picked! 🤪
Your nose is so big that Apple had to make a custom iPhone that unlocks using Nose ID.
What hit the floor first, the emo or the apple? The apple, the rope stopped the emo.
I FAMOUS NOW GUYS
What did the corn say to the flying apple?
"That's corny."
Timmy has 5 apples.
His train is 7 minutes early.
Calculate the mass of the sun.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Well, at least one gets picked.
One apple a day keeps the doctor away; not logging onto servers using management or service accounts keeps SecOps people away.
Okay, so I ate an apple and it tasted good.
You wanna know what I have in common with an apple?
We BOTH look good hanging in a tree.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple has a family tree.
How do you saw an apple with no mouth?
A P P L E
If you're ever bored, pee on an android. Apple is better!
I know this is a really bad poem, but I'll do it anyway 'cause I have nothing else to do.
'Twas so pretty a night, with people all asleep. Everyone's dreaming of that candy apple treat, and a palace. But alas! No, it's all a dream. Even eating ice cream, it's all a dream! Why can't I have this? Why can't I have that? BUT NO! It's just hitting you like a bat. YOU JUST HAVE TO HAVE IT, you say to yourself. All for me, all for me, and et cetera. It goes on and on. But why wish for riches? You're already rich enough. If you have a device, then take my advise, if you were poor you would have spent the money on food, like honey, not something that... OF ALL THINGS IS GOOGLE!
Like I said, it's really bad. :(
You're an apple. Now suck my dick!
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked. Lel. I hope you guys like this joke.
What falls from the tree first, the autistic retard or the apple?
The apple, because the rope caught the autistic retard.
If an apple and a depressed kid fall out of a tree, which one hits the ground first? The apple.
The kid just hangs there.
Why do apple trees like emo kids?
Because they like to play yoyo with them.