ANS jokes
Teacher: "I used to be an orphan once."
Student: "That’s sad."
Teacher: "Anyways, who is away today?"
Student: "Your parents."
What has two butts and kills people?
An assassin.
I once told an orphan his dad is Spider-Man because he is far from home.
Why is an iPhone X perfect for an orphan? Because it doesn't have a home button.
What do you call an old black person? Farming antique.
Defenity peeing with an erection
A man gets an email from his doctor.
"Sorry for the delay on getting your prescription, it'll be at your house tomorrow."
The man thinks to himself, "Oh shit! Then what have I been taking?"
Two cannibals have just captured a man and are about to eat him, so they cook him and lay him on a table. The first cannibal says, "You start at the bottom, I start at the top," so they both chow down.
About half an hour later, the second cannibal says, "I'm having a ball!" Then the first cannibal says, "Then you're eating too fast!"
What do you call an African American pilot?
A pilot, you racist bastard!
Q: What has two wings and a halo?
A: An Asian phone call, "Wing, Wing, Halo?"
What is the difference between a boomerang and an orphan's dad?
The boomerang comes back.
How does an Alabama mother know when her daughter is on her period? She can taste the blood on her son’s penis.
What do you call an ex eating Taco Bell?
Explosion.
Kid. What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?
Teacher. What?
Kid. Fruity pebbles with water.
Teacher. Why water?
Kid. Cause his dad never came back with the milk.
How to make an orphan BLEED?
Step 1 - Tell them to clap until they actually have a loving family.
Step 2 - LAUGH EVILLY as they BLEED.
Step 3 - Tell them to kys.
Step 4 - Leave that mental asylum.
What's the difference between a Lamborghini and an erection? I don't have a Lamborghini.
You know those paper families you cut out?
Well, I put one of those in an orphanage.
What do you call an orphan with a boner?
Porn.
Why can't an orphan sign up for adoption websites?
Parental Login: __________
What is an orphan's favorite Roblox game?
Adopt Me.
What do an ice cream cone and a Ukrainian orphanage have in common?
Children scream when they melt.