ANS jokes
What is an orphan's family reunion called?
Me time.
What is the difference between an orphan and Pikachu? Pikachu, I choose you!
What do an orphan's father and Nemo have in common?
They are both nowhere to be found.
I don't get this. Why is it I go to an orphanage and all of a sudden they said I used to be the cutest baby there?
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples are actually picked.
Memes
Look, I didn't hit rock bottom. I gracefully floated down there like Mary Poppins with an umbrella.
My wife told me to stop being an idiot.
I told her, "Which one do you want?"
What's a joke that an orphan has never heard before?
A dad joke.
How do you stop a woman from choking?
Back up an inch.
Why should you always give an emo a high five in the hallway? You can’t leave them hanging.
I tried being an emo, but I never got the hang of it.
I asked an emo girl, "Do you ever get jealous of your phone when it dies?"
Why does an orphan wanna be a criminal?
Because they wanna be wanted.
Why is E.T. better than an orphan?
Because he found his way home.
Why do strippers never care about things?
Because the last time they gave a fuck, it was for $20 an hour.
What is the difference between an illegal immigrant and E.T.?
E.T. eventually went home!
Do not be racist; be like Mario. He's an Italian plumber, who was made by the Japanese, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew!
What do you call an Asian Chihuahua?
A Konichiuahua.
what's the difference between an emo and an apple? the apple falls to the ground while the emo just hangs there.
I was walking down the street and saw a kid and I said, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"
I said, "Your parents at first."