ANS jokes
Me: You know your parents were very good people.
Orphan: Wow, I didn’t know that.
Me: I know, you're an orphan.
Why does an orphan go to church?
So they can call someone "father."
Why is an orphan like a boomerang? Because they always come back.
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family photo.
If there's ever a shooting at school, pull out an Uno reverse card.
So I went up to a crying kid and asked, "Where's your mommy?"
God, I love working at an orphanage.
What do you call an orphan you put into a volcano with a wheelchair?
Hot Wheels.
Why can't an orphan see their parents? Because there is mayo in his dick hole.
What's the difference between an orphan and cotton?
Cotton gets picked.
How do you give an "Alabama Girl" a nice compliment?
Answer: You say to her, "Hey, NICE TOOTH!"
What's an orphan's favorite sport?
Baseball, because they finally have a home.
An apple and an emo girl fall from the same height in a tree. Which one hits the ground first? The apple, cuz the noose stops her.
How do you make a trash can leak?
Hit it with an axe until it becomes part of the cosmos!
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
An RC-XD.
You can't send an Indian to walk a corner. The only corner they will get to is 7-11.
Why was the orphan's first phone an XR?
Because it had no home button.
What's an emo's favorite game?
Hangman.
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What type of flower do you give an orphan?
A self-raising [flour].
An orphan goes into a bar, and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, you need parent permission to enter."