ANS jokes
Why don't churches have Wi-Fi? Because they can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.
Your forehead is so fucking big, I had to call an Uber to get across the eyebrows to your hairline.
I know it's bad, sorry.
Go up to an orphan and say: "Yer ma is deed."
Why can't an orphan play baseball in China?
They can't find home plate.
What are the similarities of an orphan and a water fountain?
They both sprout water.
When an orphan takes a family photo, it's called a selfie.
My mom said my sister was an angel, but when I threw her out the window, she didn't fly.
Why can't an orphan play soccer on the home side of the field? They don't have a home!
I told an emo kid that we were going to hang (hangout), but they took it too literal.
What's the difference between cotton and an orphan?
Cotton gets picked.
Why does an orphan like The Beatles? Because it's family friendly.
Everyone: "Look, it's Superman!"
Me: "No, it's an emo."
Everyone: "Oh."
What flour do you buy an orphan?
Self-raising flour.
What do you call an orphan who likes football?
Because someone will actually give him something.
What’s red and goes 90 miles an hour?
What's the difference between an orange?
A hippopotamus riding a four-door motorcycle.
Why is the oldest iPhone an orphan?
It can't get the iPhone XI or XR. It doesn't have a home button.
Me: It's so sad Ironman died of ligma. You: What the heck is an Ironman? Me: Ligma balls. "snap" ^kaboom^
I got in an argument with the 90-degree angle. And guess what? It was right!
Why can't the Ctrl key cross the road? Because it is an 8-lane highway.