ANS jokes
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
They can't find home.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
What do you call an ex-lesbian?
A clitter quitter.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Imagine you are getting eaten by an alligator. What do you do?
Stop imagining!
What is an Irish kiss?
Fellatio from a gay Irishman.
So I went to Comic-Con and saw a man with an arm missing, and I thought, "Cool display," until I heard him screaming and getting the other arm chopped off. Then I said, "Man, now that's a 10/10 display, wow!"
My ex died in an anchorage accident.
She always was a sleeping hooker.
If an apple and an emo kid fell out of a tree, which would hit the ground first?
The apple, because the rope caught the emo kid.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
What is the difference between a flower and an orphan?
A flower gets picked.
Hi guys, I feel forgotten lol. I feel like a banana peel... no one will talk to me. Oh, I got a good idea! We do a Google Meet!
Jim: My grandpa fought in the army during World War Two. He was an officer.
Me: Cool, what rank of officer?
Jim: SS.
Me:...
What do you call a selfie of an orphan? A family photo.
Why are Democrats represented by the donkey? Because some Democrats can be such an ass!
What do you call an orphan taking a picture?
A self-portrait.
What do you call an injured person who doesn't want to play a game with you? A sore loser.
I have had an obsession with soap. Don’t worry, I am all clean now!
You’re a grey sprinkle on a rainbow cupcake.
You are more disappointing than an unsalted pretzel.
What do you get when you cross a pedophile and an elementary school? Predator 3.